9 Months

This is a useless post, you know, just living up to my name. It has no moral lessons and is more meandering than a post by @Miss Finest Wine .No, this thread is not about pregnancy despite the title,if that is what you wanted to see , move along.If you don't want to waste 5 minutes of your life that you want recover, this is where you alight. So yesterday import ya weekend got held up at the port(gerrit?),sijui something came up. fine young thing,i was already looking forward to spending the better part of the weekend indoors debriefing her. so i am stuck alone and crawling through ktalk archives and i come across this post by @Meria Mata .https://www.kenyatalk.com/index.php?threads/***-mastermind.43485/page-10#post-905134.
let me share with you my affair with the cancer sticks and what i know about the holy herb.
First time
cant remember the exact when i had my first smoke, it was roughly 9 years ago, i was doing CPA as i awaited to join campus later that year because my old man did not like the idea of me staying at home doing nothing. , i had smoked my first blunt a few weeks before i ever had my first cigarette. Before then, i despised people who smoked since most of the smokers i knew perpetually carried the smell of cigarettes with them. Then one day, i skipped classes at Vision Institute of Professionals(that was a waste of my fathers money) and went to visit a few of my friends at some hostels in Parki, near UON law school. the plan was to get high and hopefully catch some slices from some girl at KSPS. So i show up with some kibao vodka and my friend offers to go to the pedi and get some blunts,(broke college kids are not choosers they will drink anything including coffee spirit) the girls are on their way and its going to be a party. It was during this party that i had my first cigarette.This post is not about threshold, that we shall revisit at a later date.
The rules
the pedi was low on blunts so they ran out soon, one of my friends was smoking sportsman and offered it as an alternative. i was skeptical, i don't want to smell of tobacco all the time, so he taught me some rules i always keep up to this day.
1.brush your teeth after smoking, if you cant, have some gum,something with menthol is good
2. smoke the entire stick. don't keep half lifes on you, throw them away if you cant finish and
3.always wash your hands preferably with scented soap after smoking.
any residual smell that remains after that will gel with your cologne. everybody will be wondering what scent you wear.
Cigarettes and Blunts
cigarettes are not like weed, the technique to smoke them is different. cigarette smoke is heavier and smoother, so it does not attack your throat as much as it goes down but you will feel the heavy feeling on your lungs. Weed on the other hand requires a different technique, it is harsh, so you need to take it with lots of air. so if you put a lit blunt to your lips be sure to take it in with a deep breath, failure to do so will leave you feeling like somebody shoved a grater down to your lungs.
The high
weed and cigarettes have a different high.
the first time took a cigarette i remember the coughing , a few more puffs, then the head rush kicked in. ooh the glorious head rush, it's funny that the reason why people smoke is because of 12 seconds of feeling like you are floating, yes i know the calming feeling that comes afterwards but the highlight is that rush in the head. the first one hit me hard, so hard i had to sit down, i felt dizzy and went to bed immediately, but i was hooked.
Weed on the other hand has a very different effect on me, it creeps up on you slowly, the only way to keep track is that feeling of your scalp becoming tighter.then colors become brighter as if luminescent . i feel smarter and suddenly everyone looks much more stupid. i can be able to keep track of three different streams of thoughts effortlessly and feel like no problem is too big for my intellect.the only drawback is that i tend to psychoanalyze people too much. when i smoked my first blunt, this is the song i listened to on repeat. Akon's Freedom album was just out and i sampled it all night, me and my laptop and headphones with this song on loop. Music sounds way much better when you are high. @pseudonym , you can add this song to that dark clouds list of yours, it does wonders for me.
Sex too is way much better when you are high, it slows down and heightens the sensations at the same time enabling you to enjoy each individual moment of the experience separately. i cannot put it in words, just put it in your bucket list and do it.
the reckoning
I didn't become a serious smoker until i joined my first workplace. smoking was serious business there with one of the directors being a chain smoker, the company provided a smoking lounge. i went up from having a cigarette a day to having 5-6 sticks a day and even more when am drinking. soon i started being out of breath and smokers chest. I knew i had to quit soon.
For weed, it was easy, once the incredible high wore off, it left me tired and i could sleep an entire day, it couldn't be part of my productive adult life and it became a delicacy to be enjoyed once in a while when had nothing important coming up and with the right company.
9 Months
Why 9 months as as the title? one year ago i changed jobs and took it as an opportunity to get rid of my smoking addiction, my new workplace is not that smoker friendly, they are more into providing nursing rooms for young mothers(boy child anaangamizwa). nine months ago i made a conscious decision o quit smoking, i didn't go cold turkey but slowly eased my self off nicotine, i am now down to 3 sticks a week and one cheat day where i can smoke two sticks( doesnt count towards the three). polepole ndio mwendo.
it hasn't been easy dealing with the pangs, i discovered eating sugary stuff helps. This has seen me go from around 75 kgs to around 90, haina worse, mwanaume ni kakitambi kiasi though i dont intend to keep it. my chest is doing better now and i rarely cough.
I have also discovered smoking tea leaves is a bad idea,(dont ask) , on bad days, i roll a sticky note in the shape of a cigarette and try to cheat my body. @Meria Mata @bjurmann and other guys who are struggling to quit share your stories.
You tagged me dear...lakini hiyo sisomi. So unataka kusay my posts ni meff? just say it loud and clear. BTW what are your old handles as I can think of 2.
no old handle, just used to follow as a guest for over a year because of great content, politics came and shit went south ,promised myself i would join after the political season and play my role in providing great reads. which handles did you think of? and no, you posts are not meffi, they just have many thoughts competing for the same slot.

Miss Finest Wine

no old handle, just used to follow as a guest for over a year because of great content, politics came and shit went south ,promised myself i would join after the political season and play my role in providing great reads. which handles did you think of? and no, you posts are not meffi, they just have many thoughts competing for the same slot.
Don't believe it but hii sisomi.