Advice needed

Status
Not open for further replies.

Voltron

Village Elder
#1
I have a very sensitive situation at hand. It is usually very difficult mixing relatives and money issues. I have a close relative who is married. The family is not well off financially. I used to assist her with some cash when I started earning, but it soon became a habit. She expected me to give her cash often, as if it was my responsibility. Nonetheless, I helped when I could. About a year ago, I started a business for her, stocked it, paid rent for six months to give her a sufficient grace period for it to pick. Basically, I catered for everything and the business was located in a busy bus stop so there is huge flow of customers. I did this because I knew that she would soon start paying school fees for her girl who is due to join secondary school this year. Basically, I wanted her to be on her feet before this year. Yesterday she called me crying and begging for school fees. Considering that she has a husband, who is a chang'aa type addict, I decided enough was enough and told her to ask her husband to look for school fees because it is his job, not mine. How would you deal with such a case, considering that it is a close relative, and her husband doesnt seem to step up and do his obligations? I have tried the best I can, and it has come to a time when I have to tell her to learn how to make her husband responsible, because I cant perform the responsibilities her husband should be doing.
 

Voltron

Village Elder
#5
if the kid is smart do the needful if you are in a position to do so.good deeds will always payback tenfold.
What about her husband? Should he just go free drinking in chang'aa dens because he does not have a financial burden (school fees)? I tried my best to make her situation better...I even launched a business for her. Unfortunately, she seems to have married an irresponsible and lazy husband.
 

loonkishu

Village Elder
#8
What about her husband? Should he just go free drinking in chang'aa dens because he does not have a financial burden (school fees)? I tried my best to make her situation better...I even launched a business for her. Unfortunately, she seems to have married an irresponsible and lazy husband.
Just marry her and do all the responsibility. From what iam reading and your response it seems you already have a solution to your problem.
 

Randy

Village Elder
#9
What about her husband? Should he just go free drinking in chang'aa dens because he does not have a financial burden (school fees)? I tried my best to make her situation better...I even launched a business for her. Unfortunately, she seems to have married an irresponsible and lazy husband.

am assuming this is your sister we are talking about?
 
Last edited:

Voltron

Village Elder
#17
How did you get in this arrangement in the first place?
This is not an arrangement. She simply started borrowing money when I started earning...since she was desperate and I knew it I assisted where I could. Because she is a relative and we grew up together, I view her like a sister and I decided to open a business for her so that she can get an income. Unfortunately, it is as if she is the breadwinner in that family because the husband doesnt really care about them.
 

Voltron

Village Elder
#19
mwambie you are ready to assist her one final time but lazima awe tayari kufunga mizigo ahamie tarakea where the deadbeat husband will not find her. kama ni muti atapata ingine mbele....
I will not provide any financial help to her again...so that she can be forced to either leave the deadbeat man, or figure out how to make him responsible for his family. She cannot make a choice unless she is desperate enough to see the effect of having a deadbeat husband in the house.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.