Meet Nyongesa a buddy of myne. We nicknamed Nyongesa G-star coz ni mtu wakutoa foam—nigga is ocha ocha type bt got the connects,think he is related to that mwizi Governor of Bungoma…Dude wax for some NGO and gets good pay kitu kama 200K thnks 2 the Governor…any way let me get to storo…now G-star a.k.a Nyongesa has a CWS (come we stay) kyuk chic. They park nauko Parkie…2nd parklands in some Court.
Anyway juzi visited GStar at his crib…we chatted kidogo alafu he tells wifey named Wairimu 2 give me a drink…wifey was in jikoni…he was like …Sweet heart unawezako patiako jay ka juice (told u he ws ocha ocha type)?
Wairimu, a rangi ya thao lady bt mguu ya stove answers,kwani nime kuwa maid wako…and she said this inna rude way. I tell Gstar ama nijitoe nn…kwani mna domez na wife nn? shud i leave and let u solve ua issues…Gstar tells me…Jay usijali hii tuu ni mood swings za hawa ma dame…let her be Jay…anyway umeshindaje? Am like WTF bruh, why u let ua woman embarass u infront of ua nigga bruh,this aint right…Nyongesa a.k.a Gstar is like Jay ni ma Mood Swings ndugu…undastand her… I was like Man f*ck da mood swings show her who be the man in the house…WTF is wrong with ya…ati jay i love her…am like if u love her then teach her some discipline…Gstar is like Jay I can neva hurt my woman…she is so precious…jay are u suggesting i chapa her? Am like bruh…two hot slaps bruh…only tw0
I continue the kuchocha…tell a nigga,kwani ulienda mtoni (riverside) ya ni nn…<-- when u tell a luhya guy this it means why he was circumsized by the riverside,…u see luhya guys get katwad by the riversise mapema asubuhi na matope amepakwa,anyway back to storo,when i told Gstar this i saw tears coming out of his eyes…i knew sasa kutachemuka…i hear Nyongesa say Wairimu ebu kuja kitoko…bitch was still in kitchen…she kujaz with attitude and she like ni nini wewe…karii kii? Gstar is like ebu kuja nikuambie kitu…she comes closer and says hope ni kitu ya maana! Gstar is like baby unajua naku penda sana but…Wairimu is like but n…ev n b4 she finished saying but nini she was given a sweep…sasa ako chini,Gstar rukad on her and started throwing punches…ilibidiii i intervene when i saw her nose bleed…took Gstar outta da house to have a stroll
I told Gstar while we were inje to chillax bt same time i told him amefanya kitu ya maana,told Gstar to rudi keja after 1 hr and make love to wairimu…he was like jay bt how now,si nimemchapa,told a G ttrust me…
FFWD: nest day i received a call from Gstar: hejus said JAY napenda sana,wewe ni mtu wa nguvu