Ati utaoa lini ama utapatiana ball lini? maswali za upuzi hizi among kenyans

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#1
Ati Brayo utaoa lini ama utatinga ball lini? Toa ka label brayo tukutambue...hizi ni gani sasa i say? kwani ni lazima mtu akiwa na msuss lazima apatiane ball ama kumarry..sasa kama boyz ako fitty na hajajipanga haja gani a kujiletea mastress..uko jobless na ukipata wax ni zile za inda na haujui ita last 4 how long. Msuss wako anadunga salon..ile pesa mob anaweza kamu nazo mtaa after a long day salon ni pengine 400 bob. Wewe uko pale kwa muhindi..salo lazima inachelewa na at times unaskia Patel anasema "Brayo, biashara apana zuri hii mwezi, chukua hii 4,000 alafu biashara ikija juu mimi nalipa wewe the rest..iko sawa Brayo?" sahizo mshande ni tenga kumi (10,000) wewe ni driver wa muhindi lakini bado anakupea makazi zingine on top of that..kama kupelekea watoi wake lunches shule alafu kuwa pick kutoka chuo...na kwa duka yake wewe bado ni Tea boy..kumpikia chai, na pia unaambiwa uoshe choo at times. Ukifikisha watoi home after dropping them na sahizo ni 5pm unaskia house ife wa Patel anasema wewe brayo patia umbwa nyama..yaani ulishe madoggy zao na ni zile kubwa German shepherds,hazikutambui...Stress oooh

Unarudi mtaa kwa msuss...nyote mmefika same time..ametoka salon ame beat..pia wewe ume beat...ugali ya jana ambayo mlikula kama breakfast asubuhi na chai ndo bado iko mezani, ilifunikwa na sufuria.. unainua hio sufuria kucheki size ya ugali..unaona joo nikubaya..unatoka unaenda kwa mama akinyi wa kibanda,,unakopa mayai nne, kitungu moja na nyanya moja..unamshow aki adisie royco cube anadinda lakini unam sweet talk alafu anakupa..fika mtaa msuss unampatia ako ka shopping,,,kamapika hip mix ya mayai, kitungu, na kuweka flavor anaongeza ako ka royco cube...sembe ama kitoweo ni ile ile sembe ya morning....

unacheki msuss hivi as yr eating and ask yrselves Je kuna haja ya kupata kajunia sai ama tuolewe? question marks kwa kichwa...Before hata amja nawa mikono kukula mnaskia mtu anabisha....kufungua mlango unapata ni kale bro wa manzi wako mwenye alikuchapa after u had slapped yr msuss..jamaaa alinusa mayai 1 mile away,,unaskia ikisema...ati na hio mayai inanukia poa...alafu msuss ako zile za nawa mkono bro tukule! WHAT LIFE IS THIS
 

Smith_

Village Elder
#8
Be strong Bryan. U shall overcome. Remember, people out there have worse problems than yours...

Imagine now that you are g**. It's not one's choice to be g**. You are no longer a kid. Everybody is asking when you are getting married. Your parents say they want grandchildren. This is Africa, and in 2015, you can't really come out and tell them why that may not happen.

People start talking and speculating. But you decide to develop a thick skin and not give a sh*t what others say or think. Most of the 'friends' you grew up with at home, at school, at campus etc are hitched... they are also posting baby pics all the time on social media. You have overheard one say explicitly that they no longer hang out with unmarried guys. You have started drifting apart. At home, nowadays you dread those Xmas get-togethers coz almost all your cuzos, even the younger ones, wamekuja na somebody. You also dread going for those wedoz and ruracios coz everybody is insisting that you're next. At work, all your peers and age mates are married. They are taking paternity leave ever so often. You have heard that ka-story from back in 2005 about that buda who was denied the promotion you are eyeing coz he was deemed not to be the right 'fit.' Single men in their late 30s or in their 40s are deemed to be irresponsible and unfocused. You know one or two g** guys who have caved in and decided to get a woman just so that they could fit in and give society the 'right image.' But you also know of the double life they are living ( http://bit.ly/1cv8YPL ) , the ceremonial wives they are deceiving and the innocent kids caught up in all of it and it makes you SICK!

You met someone. You felt that this time it was real. But you can't really introduce them to anybody apart from your other g** friends. Your family knows them as that 'close friend.' Your siz visited over the weekend and noted that he has moved in. You explain that he recently shifted from Nakuru and needed a place to stay 'temporarily' as he settles down in this tough Nairobi. Neighbours notice with curious stares how 2 guys anika nguoz together and go for shopping pamoja. You have to DFHKM with loud music on as a distraction. You had to tighten the bolts and nuts of your kitanda coz the chick the house directly downstairs is a kimbelembele who seems to know exactly who lives in what house and what makelele she heard last night. And you can never be sure how your landlord will take some 'stories.'

Just like straight couples, g** couples also go through relationship problems. He has been complaining that you're working too late too often. Even most weekends. He thinks that either you are not serious about the relationship or something is going on. You have tried to explain to no avail. But you have nobody to turn to, except your other g** friends. But they have their limitations as potential advisors or counsellors and you realize that some don't have your best intentions at heart. You can't talk to your straight friends, your family, your relatives, your church. The arguments are getting worse. It was almost a fight the other day. Now he is threatening to pack and leave for Nakuru.

WHAT LIFE IS THIS?
 

gapcrew

Village Elder
#9
Hapo kwa mayai you can substitute with omena cheap protein when you are with your msupa....mayai ni ya mabachelor unaweza kula kama msupa hayuko....pole bro.....life will get better..
 

4makind

Village Elder
#11
Hehehe......... consider getting your writing skills earn you cash,............. This is a good script for a local production. can be a play, a song, movie......,

Sio lazima uandikwe/uajiriwe kwa mhindi

Kazi kwako
 

byro

Village Elder
#13
da fuq smith na g** fantasies..anzisha story yako kwa handle mpya..@bryan brayo ..things will get better but gets even best mkido things together si lazima muwe na mtoi.
 
#15
@Bryan Brayo I feel you though my advice to you is kuwa mujanjez ukipiga punani otherwise utajenga mjunia before you know it. Remember when you going through too much pressure most of the time comfort comes from kuchapa df and before you know it another baby is born.
 
#20
Be strong Bryan. U shall overcome. Remember, people out there have worse problems than yours...

Imagine now that you are g**. It's not one's choice to be g**. You are no longer a kid. Everybody is asking when you are getting married. Your parents say they want grandchildren. This is Africa, and in 2015, you can't really come out and tell them why that may not happen.

People start talking and speculating. But you decide to develop a thick skin and not give a sh*t what others say or think. Most of the 'friends' you grew up with at home, at school, at campus etc are hitched... they are also posting baby pics all the time on social media. You have overheard one say explicitly that they no longer hang out with unmarried guys. You have started drifting apart. At home, nowadays you dread those Xmas get-togethers coz almost all your cuzos, even the younger ones, wamekuja na somebody. You also dread going for those wedoz and ruracios coz everybody is insisting that you're next. At work, all your peers and age mates are married. They are taking paternity leave ever so often. You have heard that ka-story from back in 2005 about that buda who was denied the promotion you are eyeing coz he was deemed not to be the right 'fit.' Single men in their late 30s or in their 40s are deemed to be irresponsible and unfocused. You know one or two g** guys who have caved in and decided to get a woman just so that they could fit in and give society the 'right image.' But you also know of the double life they are living ( http://bit.ly/1cv8YPL ) , the ceremonial wives they are deceiving and the innocent kids caught up in all of it and it makes you SICK!

You met someone. You felt that this time it was real. But you can't really introduce them to anybody apart from your other g** friends. Your family knows them as that 'close friend.' Your siz visited over the weekend and noted that he has moved in. You explain that he recently shifted from Nakuru and needed a place to stay 'temporarily' as he settles down in this tough Nairobi. Neighbours notice with curious stares how 2 guys anika nguoz together and go for shopping pamoja. You have to DFHKM with loud music on as a distraction. You had to tighten the bolts and nuts of your kitanda coz the chick the house directly downstairs is a kimbelembele who seems to know exactly who lives in what house and what makelele she heard last night. And you can never be sure how your landlord will take some 'stories.'

Just like straight couples, g** couples also go through relationship problems. He has been complaining that you're working too late too often. Even most weekends. He thinks that either you are not serious about the relationship or something is going on. You have tried to explain to no avail. But you have nobody to turn to, except your other g** friends. But they have their limitations as potential advisors or counsellors and you realize that some don't have your best intentions at heart. You can't talk to your straight friends, your family, your relatives, your church. The arguments are getting worse. It was almost a fight the other day. Now he is threatening to pack and leave for Nakuru.

WHAT LIFE IS THIS?
haiyaaa ni ukweli?
 
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