Carolines Mutuko tribute to Her late sister

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Senior Villager
I’ll be
I’ll be
sister’s passing has changed
me, made me keenly aware of
certain things that I only ever
saw out of the corner of my
eye. Above all, it has set me
hundred paces forward on a
journey I embarked on last
year that I am thrilled to take
to it’s ultimate conclusion –
living in full colour.
Regina in her own special way
has just re-ignited a spark in
my belly into a roaring flame.
So should you come across me
in the coming days, weeks and
months and feel that I’m in
full throttle, don’t be alarmed,
don’t be surprised and above
all don’t be worried. Anyone
who knew my sister, worked
with her, prayed with her,
worked-out with her, knows
there was a no-nonsense,
pragmatic way to how she
approached life.
My younger sister has once
again given me a wonderful
nudge forward and taught me
a few lessons that I wish to
share with you.
Here’s what I now know for
1. Today is all we’ve got, take
it, grab, embrace it and live it
well. As well as you know how.
In your own way. Marching to
the beat of your own drum is
never a bad thing. She and I
said it to each other, to others
and today and now more than
ever, I re-emphasize it. Live
your life, run your race and
make the decisions that make
sense for you.
2. Regina had little patience
of hand wringing and empty
talk. She was action oriented.
The tributes she received said
it all. Get on with it – what
are you waiting for? Your life
is not between the moments
of your birth and death. Your
life is between now and your
next breath. The present –
the here and now – is all the
life you ever get. So live each
moment in full, in kindness
and peace, without fear or
3. The truth about people is
spoken by their actions.
You’re going to come across
people in your life who will
say all the right words at all
the right times; but in the
end, it’s always their actions
you should judge them by. So
pay attention to what people
do. Their actions will tell you
everything you need to know.
4. Love those who love you
fiercely. Embrace them, kiss
them, care for them, let them
know they matter. We miss
Regina, but none of us is in
doubt about how she felt
about us and we know she
had no doubt about how we
felt about her.
5. Tell those who matter, what
matters to you, that way they
are never in doubt about what
to do or how to carry on in
your absence. Regina was
clear from the moment she
had her son that she was
raising a man and she told us
as much – often. From her
friends to her pastor to the
teachers at my nephew’s
school – we are all clear and
united in what we know we
must do when it comes to
Richard to honour his mother.
6. Everyone deserves to love
and be loved in return. Don’t
settle for less. Regina was
complete and clear about how
she felt about those she chose
to call friends. She loved
them and they loved her and
it was clear for all who knew.
No grey areas.
7. Do the job you have with
excellence and zeal. Regina
never settled for half
measures. Some of her
decisions may have made her
unpopular with some and
even made some people
uneasy. But because she was
clear what the ultimate goal
was, Regina never relented on
striving for flawless excellence
and execution in anything she
sort to do.
8. True, honest, strong
friendships are a blessing and
a choice we get to make.
Choose wisely. Regina never
had anyone in her circles she
didn’t resonate with. Don’t
short-change yourself or
anyone in your life by giving
less than your best or
demanding they give you the
best of them. Once you find
these friendships – treasure
them with all the love you can
9. Surround yourself with the
things that make you happy.
That are beautiful in your
eyes. The flowers in her
house, the burst of yellow in
every room, the order of
things and doing things was
her way. If it was beautiful
and made her smile, she
treasured it and celebrated it
– didn’t matter if you thought
it was silly.
10. Happiness is when you
feel good about yourself
without feeling the need for
anyone else’s approval. You
are your most important
relationship. – You must first
have a healthy relationship
with yourself before you can
have a healthy relationship
with others. Regina made it a
point to ensure that she was
good to herself, her mind and
her spirit, before embarking
on anything with anyone else.
After all, you cannot give what
you do not have.
Here’s the real deal – A
lifetime isn’t very
long. Realise that right now
you’re lucky because you still
have a chance. So stop for a
moment and think. Whatever
you still need to do, start
doing it today. There are only
so many tomorrows.
Through Regina I am now
truly aware that my time is
limited and the life I have is
a gift. It is time to use this
gift well, starting now. Rest In
Peace Reggie and thank you.
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