Dealing with divorce/separation

Bazuka

Village Elder
#23
heavily emotionally and financially
Hapa ndio iko shida..kama manzi/wife hawezi nunua kitu Kwa nyumba iyo no signs
Kama manzi yako hajawai kusho anakupenda chunga Sana esp the don't caring ones
Manzi anafaa pia yeye anaspend...but pale sector ya jikoni anaweka zile both hata vitu zisipoenda poa hautabaki vibaya amienda na vitu

Manzi mpoa anakuheshimu na hawezi taka nyumba take ivunjike

Kuzoeana na kuzoea iyo punani from experience huwa inaeza haribu nyumba faster sana
 

Shaka

Village Elder
#28
People find solution in things that offer temporary relief, like alcohol and s@x. While simple techniques like meditation and speaking to your inner self is very effective. You get into that state of mind where you observe situations and characters in you life without any emotional feelings. Then you accept what you can't change, discard or approve what you want. If you someone hurt you or is influencing you in a negative way, you discard by assuming he is a airplane that flies away from you till you can no longer see it. You can do this two or three times and it works
 
#29
Senior talkers,I have a problem. One of my close buddies recently separated/divorced with this wife of 2 years after some irreconcilable differences cropped up between them. Hawakuwa na watoto bado but my guy is super depressed and has taken to drinking heavily and ferking hoes with no abandon. He is suicidal especially baada ya kujua that his ex is already pushing with another nigga. I even fear he will end up spiraling into the deadly abyss akiendelea hivi. Najua hapa hakuwezi kosa a few divorced/separated talkers - especially those who had invested heavily emotionally and financially in the union. Tusadie huyu jamaa,how did u guys pick up the pieces and moved on?
Heartbreak is heartbreak and it's an inevitable part of life. He is grieving and so he must. There's no way around it but through. Drinking and sleeping around is just putting off the inevitable. They are escapes and there really is no way of escaping grief. You just must go through it. I think one reason why life expectancy of men is upto 10 years lower on average is because the culture doesn't allow them to grieve their losses. What they do is suppress it and use escapes and diversions. And the grief just keeps piling from different losses until they erupt and they murder someone or commit suicide. The important thing is that energy to leave the body is gym is a good idea. Martial arts something aggressive.

Do you think he'd consider therapy? Talking sure helps though men do not talk about their problems. If he had a female friend he could talk to her. Or a close female relative. I had this male friend who was really a womanizer and a tough guy but somehow ended up heartbroken over a certain woman. I think she cheated on him, I don't remember the details it was a long time back. He would call me and vent for one hour, I guess, he was too embarrassed to do it face to face. For the whole one hour he would talk, talk, talk about nothing else but her sometimes he would even cry. All I would do is say aha, ehe and I am sorry and affirm his feelings and what he was saying. After some time he was fine. Back to his usual self. The important thing is not to hold it in. Find an outlet.
 
#32
I bet my bottom dollar the wife realized the cash flow was not as expected or hustle ama job ilikatika....Acceptance is key, he should accept he has been played. He should then evaluate the relationship and identify the red flags he ignored or missed, easy if he is honest to himself. Resolve and work to better himself and his situation. Subscribing to coach red pill and coach greg adams would be nice too. If he regains his resolve am sure he will emerge the winner and when that time comes may he NEVER EVER let her back, may he not harbour bitterness or wish bad things on the wife, the opposite of love is indifference
 

Intro Vert

Senior Villager
#33
1. As with any other deal, NEVER WALK AWAY FROM THE TABLE UNTIL YOU ARE READ TO WALK AWAY FROM THE TABLE.
2. As every man should know, your ego will punish you ruthlessly if you expose it to situations that will make it suffer. Refer to 1 above.
3. Since the damage is already done, let's offer solutions. @upepo above is onto something. MOVE AWAY FROM THE AREA/SITUATIONS that expose you to your ex. Block her phone number and all social media accounts. Work tirelessly to improve your life - join a fucking gym. lift weights. Increase your portfolio. Charge ahead and DO NOT for a moment let your thoughts entertain your ex. Remove every trace of her in your life. FORGET her.

In as much as guys would love to hear a magical solution to this, THERE IS NO MAGICAL SOLUTION to this. Any man that shall expose their nature-endowed ego to the risk of pain shall get what they deserve. If he shall kill himself or do a Kinuthia-Shoka thing, nature does not care.

Romantic love is one of the greatest lies perpetrated on humans. It has made Hollywood movie Directors and studio executives into millionaires. Think about it. Who taught you how to love your woman? From the dates and the shit? From school? NO. Intellectual movie directors and studio execs did. They KNOW you are dumb and they made a buck out of it.

STOP FUCKING FALLING IN LOVE WITH WOMEN! THERE IS NO SUCH THING. WOMEN CANNOT LOVE A MAN THE WAY A MAN WANTS TO BE LOVED.

You can love a woman, but for f**k'S SAKE don't make it romantic love. Don't expect a woman to love you back. When you do you are exposing your ego to risk and my fren you will get what you deserve - Pain and misery.

Anybody interested in Private consultation at a fee DM me.
We can also say that its only your mom that can give you UNCONDITIONAL love.
 
#35
Before I forget...that guy is lucky, at least the kunguru left early, some guys raise other men's kids and live with "faithful" wives who are undercover distributors of pudesh....If you believe in God, such events are for him to guide you away from serious, sometimes irreparable problems down the road
 

Idias

Village Elder
#36
The legendary @Uvuvwevwevwe Onyetenyevwe , I salute you. Take note of the following:-
  1. Separation and divorce are two different things,
  2. Show your friend to this wretched place apewe advice,
  3. Kunguru hafugiki,
  4. Tell your friend to savour the new found freedom. Some of us pray daily mabibi watuondokee but hawang'atuki,
  5. Hata rafiki ajinyonge, ex bado atanyanduliwa tuu,
  6. Atombee Malaya kabisa. Itamwondolea stress,
  7. Nimechoka kutype.
:D:D:D:DBosses u deserve an award for those responses!!!no coming back from that !!
 

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