How to beat the cold

Climate change is unfolding before our very eyes. The cold season starts in late May or early June and not July. The rainy season used to be in Mar/Apr and Nov/Dec. Nowadays it just rains whenever it fucking wants and lasts as long as it wants and droughts have become more frequent. Ahit this climate change, man.

Now we have the Kenyan winter and we are not used to this level of cold except for the Limuru and maybe Kinqngop guys. It's so cold my mjulbeng has shrunk to 5 inches. I can't take a d*ck pick and send it to Shiru just to offend her under these conditions. On the other hand I can definitely bang her till kingdom come. It would definitely help me beat the weather. And now, the list:

  • f**k someone or something after every meal. Any orifice that helps you to cumis game at this point. You are also allowed to lower your standards for women or conversely, men.
  • Do not shower daily. Monday is a compulsory showering day but the rest are not that important. Once a week, twice a week, three times or a maximum of four times a week. It's your choice.
  • Take a hot beverage regularly
  • Do not drink cold water or take cold snacks like ice cream. Warm or hot water is best.
  • Eat more food. The heat generated when the food is metabolized is good for you.
  • Avoid boda boda unless you wear one of those really heavy jackets last chezt problems follow you.
  • If you are a drinker of alcoholic drinks, avoid beers or those millet/sorghum/barley/wheat based drinks with alcohol content less than 15%. Take spirits - vodka, gin, brandy, whiskies (whisky, whiskey, bourbon, cognac) or wine.
And now a random image


Disclaimer: I haven't done a spell check on this post and if you read it and maybe find an error in grammar or spelling and that's where you get stuck and comment on it, f**k YOU IN ADVANCE!