how to deal with chipo funga

  1. She Has No Right To DEMAND Anything: If she asks politely then it’s another story. BUT, if she comes up with some demands like, “I can’t eat bread in the morning, so make sure you have some bacon and sausages, oh and hot water for showering too”. First of all, if you agreed to go home then you’ll have to obey my rules, not me following your orders.

  2. Don’t Give Her Money: Money doesn’t come easy the way you picked her up from the club. If you bought her booze, then that’s it. Salon, airtime, and stiletto money go ask your boyfriend for that.

  3. Use Public Bus: Cheap things are simple to get in life. She can’t suddenly become high-maintenance and start asking to be take home in a taxi. The best you can do is paying her matatu fare.

  4. She MUST Leave Very Early In The Morning: Don’t let her tell you that she wants to prepare breakfast or wash your clothes. You can do that yourself. Once you’re done with her, take her to the bus stop. Just the other day, my friend picked up a lady who stayed at his place for two weeks! He had to call the watchmen to kick her out.

  5. No Texting and Chatting: We’re Not Friends Like That! – After the business is done it’s a wrap, I have no other business with you. A lady you picked from a night club should not start texting you trying to find out how you’re doing. We are not buddies, little sister.

  6. I don’t Really Need to Know Everything About You: Avoid those women who start telling you stories about her family, friends, and schoolmates, it has nothing to do with you! I’m not taking you home to sleep with your career or your drunkard uncle.

  7. DO NOT GET INTO A RELATIONSHIP WITH HER! – If you make an attempt of dating one, you’ll just lose her to yet another equally thirsty man, the same way you found her.

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Rules… Ukiona mwoman amekubali ku chipod na mlimeet for the first time the previous night jua huyo ni desperado au pokoste… Fukuza yeye first thing asubuhi

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This should also apply to sausage fungwas

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6/10 chipos I have fungad usually ‘forget’ their linen in my crib. Does this mean anything learned friends?

I don’t take strangers to my house am paranoid as fuck. I had an uncle who was drugged to death ever since chips funga is a no go zone for me.

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Hapa ujerumani kuna ma MILF who go to African clubs ku sausage funga mavijana wa Africa …if u play yr cards Right huyo mwoman can be yr sponsor yr entire life… Mshow ma romance kiasi kama kumvutia kiti before she sits mkiwa restaurant on a date… Kwisha… I got many pals driving big cars Juu ya Hawa masponsor wajerumani… Kwanza sai ni summer wako hunting mbaya… Mtu unapata juu ya career amefika 45 na hana mtoto wala bwana sasa anasakanya love

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Lakini Jay ulienda huku na hii mpango?

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Tell us more, naona mumepata hustle ingine above kuosha tu-fossil haga!

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He he…you start imagining those horror movies like wrong turn, I feel guthithimukwo wen a stranger after going out wants kunishika shika …leave a lone kupewa ride…

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Nlijua ningepata hizi response… Waseh and ladies nko na mwoman mjerumani young… Hawa wazee sio type Yangu bt siwezi kataa i screwed wengi when I was an FOB fresh outta boat… My current gal is called Bianca… Mtoto blonde hivi… If u pay attention at my threads then u might have seen her… Chezeni ndogo

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Frankly speaking Jay, aren’t these blonde miwomen only enjoying you. Given that many jungus look down upon blacks, aren’t you used just for a lay?

leave a lone kupewa ride…

When i see is guys getting lifts from strangers my heart drops to the stomach…I have heard horror stories of some motherfuckers who are out harvest kidneys.sometimes I think am too paranoid for my own well being.

You take life seriously @Randy. Loosen it kidogo.

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This site is a smorgasbord of mismatched ghouls with disdain for the living.

Pole bro.

Jay your slang maze, mara mwoman, sasa pokoste na desperado.

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True I have a friend yuko kwa hiyo bizna ya Macklub Tao. 70% ya mapoko hubeba pishori. Wako na maarangement na mabouncer na wasee wa taxi for easy entry n escape.

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My only rule is no cooking in the house with a stranger, when leaving the club, get some fast food… asubuhi if she is still lingering around {I find it hard to chase someone kama mbwa}, I suggest tuende kwa hoteli we take breakfast

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Kindly expound.

Am also too paranoid about strangers, keep it funga mtu unajua, like your pals friends, girlfriends friends, colleagues etc…

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