Kumangana Nairobi lodgo

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mache

Village Elder
#1
Have you ever found yourself in this situation? Umeenda out on a weekday say wednesday hivi, then there is so much fun and you hook up a kadame na kanaingia box. she accepts to go with you to a lojo. you manga her one joti then you feel you have so much psyke you manga another one. after 2 and a half jotis you collapse and sleep. Unaamka asubuhi jua imewaka and you remember you are a married man so haujaenda home and you are supposed to be at work. utado?
 

mache

Village Elder
#5
hapo ndio serekali huingilia kati literally........just say you got arrested but make sure your mood conveys the same.........
yenyewe hapo ni kusema serikali tafadhali niko saidi mbaya kabisa. and you ask wife akutumie mpesa ya cashbail
 

Ice_Cube

Village Chief
#6
Fake a Kidnap anyway first of all settle things out with the wife via phone hata akikasirika let her know you are safe so that she does not call your place of employment frantically thinking you are in any harm or even dead. After that come up with an excuse why you will be late at work, its better to be late than get to work dirty, with smelly clothes. Take a shower at the lodgo (assuming it has one) then go home and change. any nagging at home is not comparable to losing your Job.

Na usirudie Makosa
 

Weston

Village Elder
#13
Just pitia tao kwa hao watu wa exhibition,nunua shati na tai.change tu hapo kimbia ofisi halafu uitishe excuse uende home kusort na bibi
 

Mwa

Village Elder
#15
jamaa alishikwa na polisi mwanamke akapelekwa kwake. Akamwambie ampe kashoti kamoja. Kimchezo hizi madam akaficha nguo za njamaa. wakakulana mpaka asubuhi.
Morning wakachora ati jamaa afungiwe ndani ya cell na askari mmoja mwanaume apigie bibi amuambie achukue bwanake kamukunji police station.
It worked. bibi alikuja bio akatoa jamaa na akampea pole mingi sana.
 

Ice_Cube

Village Chief
#16
jamaa alishikwa na polisi mwanamke akapelekwa kwake. Akamwambie ampe kashoti kamoja. Kimchezo hizi madam akaficha nguo za njamaa. wakakulana mpaka asubuhi.
Morning wakachora ati jamaa afungiwe ndani ya cell na askari mmoja mwanaume apigie bibi amuambie achukue bwanake kamukunji police station.
It worked. bibi alikuja bio akatoa jamaa na akampea pole mingi sana.


:D:D
 
#17
PLAN A....after kuamka unapataa miss calls kama kumi kutoka kwa Wife ,don't call back just text her...baibe am ok got arrested jana kwa matatu tukienda home....ndio tunapelekwa milimani court...nitumiye 2500 just incase juu ya bail...will call tukitoka

then enda call job...patiana excuss unalate kidogo...kama uko na beste akushikiliye before boss atokee
then shower ,panguza izo masperm kwa JOSTO...nunua shirt na tie vaa enda shoe shinner kimbiya job...

ukifika job ikifika afternoon fake a headache ...omba ruhusa uende home....
then ukienda home zile nguo ulibuy tupa vaa zile zako za jana...juu umelala cell
then tafuta beste yako akuchape ngumi poa kwa uso...atleast uende kama umefura nyumbani ndio wife aonee kweli ulikuwa karao...


PLAN B

dryfry iyo chipo hadi saa nane....piga simu job call in sick
enda home saa kumi ukinuka condoms like a real MAN
 

Lifeist

Village Elder
#19
PLAN A....after kuamka unapataa miss calls kama kumi kutoka kwa Wife ,don't call back just text her...baibe am ok got arrested jana kwa matatu tukienda home....ndio tunapelekwa milimani court...nitumiye 2500 just incase juu ya bail...will call tukitoka

then enda call job...patiana excuss unalate kidogo...kama uko na beste akushikiliye before boss atokee
then shower ,panguza izo masperm kwa JOSTO...nunua shirt na tie vaa enda shoe shinner kimbiya job...

ukifika job ikifika afternoon fake a headache ...omba ruhusa uende home....
then ukienda home zile nguo ulibuy tupa vaa zile zako za jana...juu umelala cell
then tafuta beste yako akuchape ngumi poa kwa uso...atleast uende kama umefura nyumbani ndio wife aonee kweli ulikuwa karao...


PLAN B

dryfry iyo chipo hadi saa nane....piga simu job call in sick
enda home saa kumi ukinuka condoms like a real MAN
Like a real man:D:D:D:D

Uko MIA sana, Magazine ya kijiji iko wapi mjamaa?
 
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