Long hekaya.
Juzi nimeona hekaya ya church girls hapa ikanikumbusha my days in campus.I did not have the time to comment but since sasa serikali ya Gachagua imeona inipokonye kazi,wacha niwasimulie.
After finishing 4th form,I got admitted at Maseno Uni to do some shitty course that has honestly helped me in no way.No regrets though.As an elder here once said,campus is all about the papers and the experience and nothing to do with the content.I got myself room 36 pale Kilimanjaro hostels and started the most revered of lives;Campus life.
Being from an average hustling household,I had the basics but sasa zile za kupiga sherehe required me to pull up the antennae and find something to do.I have always had a business accumen but hakuna vile ningeanza kuhawk mathwiti na mithukuti kwa lecture halls.Again,I didnât have the capital to setup a decent hustle ya kunipatianga kakitu banae.So I resorted to my self imposed talent;football.Now izo enzi kulikuanga na kaweekly allowance that every player used to get for attending the daily training.
Issue sasa ilikua ni kukua spotted since to make it to the schoolteam one needed to be extra good.Apo sitadanganya elders. I wasnât thaat good.Nilikua tu average if not worse,reason being I am purely one footed.Ilibidi niabort
mission after seeing wasee wa western na lakeside vile wanaguza kapira.I stood no chance.
Having been born and bred in SDA,kuenda kanisa was second nature.Like everyone else I had my doubts in matters religion,and being an avid reader it surely culminated into a full blown spiritual paralysis later in life.So on this day nimepiga toja yangu ya jeans,tshirt,loafers na begani nikawekelea my old blazer that nilitoka nayo highschool where I used to be a piri.By the then standards, nilikua nimevaa vizuri.
Naingia pale LH15(where the SDA fraternity used to hold their sato service) napata kumejaa.Of course Mlango natumia ni ile main inakuanga all the way opposite the altar.Some usher anakuja anashika mimi mkono ati kuna kiti uko mbele.Am a very socially awkward and introverted motherfucker therefore walking across the isle when hundreds of people are watching me is usually a nightmare but I managed though kuna mahali niliteguka umati ikacheka kidogo.
For those who donât know,ibada ya SDA hukuwa very subtle and methodical.Kuna time ya hymns,and only voices and the keyboard are used.Huko hakunaga kupiga makofi.Sasa ile wakati ya kuimba Nyimbo za Kristo ilifika na unfotunately mkisii ya keyboard ilikua imekimbia msalani.Msichana ya kuongoza wimbo ikaamua kuimbisha watu dry fry hahaa.
Now guys,I may have been a fraud in football and so many other things but hii kitu inaitwa piano mimi ni mwalimu.Si ati am blowing my own trumpet ama nini but I can literally make those white and black keys talk.I can stand among the best na nihesabiwe bila tashwishi.
Now elders whatever you are thinking is what happened.That was my Damascus moment.Nilisimama nikatembea aste aste nikakalia hiyo kiti.What transpired was a prolonged session of hymns na niko sure roho alishuka ju hapo ndio nilistamp my prowess in the whole campus as one of the finest.Foundation ya hekaya.
Afew days later nikapokea simu kutoka kwa some strange guy asking me if I was Mr so and so.Nikasema ni mimi.The dude went ahead to invite me to Maseno sports club tukachapa story tukimumunya apple juice na ugali kuku.This nigga really knew how to get into a comradeâs good books.I was impressed.Singekataa niitiwalo.Apparently this guy was the choir patron apo Anglican church maseno na alikua anataka mpiga kinanda mashuhuri for their upcoming album recording.How he got to know about me sijawaijua na sikubother kuuliza but gig tunayo hatunayo?
The allowances were good and choir practice was daily.Mastering the songs was very easy since the songs had no creativity and used almost the same beat.But lazima nifike daily ndio nipate kakitu banae.
Naamini Mungu ni mmoja and so I chose to worship Him palipo buttered bread.Mambo ya SDA nikawacha.
Most of the choir members walikua wanyore wa hapo within but kulikua na afew campus studes.Hapo umalaya haikuwa imeniingia so i didnât try a thing.Untill I met her.
You see, in my first few weeks or so she wasnât there ju alikua out of the country.But on this fateful equitorial sunday morning,look and behold,the ven canonâs wife is holding the mic,her voice echoing the Sayona speakers smooth and melodious.The piano, relaxed under my safe hands is accentuating the moment.Oh my.Doen Moenâs worships have never sounded more serene.In all its holiness, I got a boner.Hahaa.
She wasnât dressed ati vibaya.Nope.Actually alikua amevaa one of those long modest rindas na ata mpenyo ya kuona ngozi hakuna labda tu shingo na ankles.Reason ya kumbao ni I am a sucker for vocals.I can choose a good voice over nyash.Sauti is up there in my munchiesâ must haves, only third after boobs and brains.
It was one hell of a performance.After church nikaambiwa mama kanisa anataka kuona hiyo maestro ilikua inanyorosha machine.Nikajua apa napewa tip.Sijaanza kupenda pesa jana.So nikafululiza moja kwa moja hadi kwa one of utwo tuofisi twenye tunakuanga adjacent to the altar.Watu ya ACK mnanielewa.And for those who may be wondering Ven Canon ni nini,they are the equivalent of priests pale catholic but kwa hii church they arenât oathed to celibacy.
Mama ameketi kindah busy nyuma ya lappy so naingia narudisha mlango kisha nakalia the empty seat opposite her.I like the scent of the kasmall office.I have a very sensitive nose and its both a blessing and a curse at the same time.Hii kitu imenifanya nikatae ikus nyingi apa nje bana.Moja kwanza ni ya a very sought after tiktoker.Story for another day.
I love lavender.It was faint in the air so i breathed long to trap as more of it as possible.As i did that,i trapped another faint scent of âold spicesâ.Damn.The mixture was heavenly.I savoured the healing scent in my lungs and let it linger.The clock on the wall ticked away slowly.I couldnât hold it no more so i let out a long breathe.
Hahaa.This mama kumbe had long finished and slammed the lappy shut and was now watching me.Gaddamnit.Nipee karwabe mi niishie.I am embarrassed.On her face flashes a rather warm smile.And for the first time I notice her facial beauty.Alaah.Sina mbisha but for the sake of relativity,picture a tamed version of Sanaipei, only lighter in complexion.
âWewe ndiye mpiga kinanda mgeni?â
She asks and i instantly detect a foreign accent in her Swahili;the kind spoken by summerbunies wakitoka Texas na Illinois kuosha meffi ya vikongwe.
"Yeah ni mimi."I answer in the affirmative.
"You did a really good job.I loved it."She said in a heavy American accent confirming my suspicion.
She raised her arm kupick her purse at the far end of the desk and that faint old spices scent rose with it.I sucked it in again this time gently because it was really pronounced.
"Old spices"She casually says.
"I can tell."I blurt out and quickly regret it remembering who she was.
She absent mindedly stops searching her purse,and with a cheeky grin says ,âSi vidole tu kumbe.â
I laughed gently not getting the dig.Nilikua ngâombe izo enzi.
Afew seconds later it appeared ni kama hapati whatever she was searching.
Am disappointed.But her next words were music to my ears.
âNisaidie na your mpesa number i send you something.I know you comrades only have money in theory.â
Wasomi hiyo hapo mwisho ni a line from Betrayal in the City.
"Is that Mr Tumbo?"I ask finally enjoying this ladyâs literary infused sarcasm.
Mama akapanua mdomo akacheka and ngaiz iyo kicheko ilikua safi.Alafu akacork kichwa sideways,akaraise eyebrow moja,and a crooked smile kama ya ule Betty Kyalo malaya kisha akauliza âAm sure you wouldnât forget the only sexual moment of the play.â
Nikacheka kama kafala.Mehn.Kukua sapiosexual is all rosy untill upatane na a woman who can give you a run for your money.What was a tense moment turned out to be a beefy discussion and slowly but surely ikaturn out kukua some harmless and good natured flirtations.
Nding nding nding.3k kwa msape.Watu yangu iyo ilikua mbesa tamu sana back then.
âUnacheka na mke wa pastor for forty minutes na si neno mnadiscuss.Bye.â
Hivyo ndivyo nilikua dismissed wadau.Kumbe she heard adjacent door ikifunguliwa and she had to dismiss me.I didnât bother to question why she panicked.
That day jioni we chatted kidogo kidogo and despite being a novice kuna kitu ilikua inaniambia uyu kamatha kuna vile amependa vibe.Hapo ndipo mtoto wa kike came clean akaniambia that she is actually not a believer and that she views religion as a tool for ensuring morality and order.Kanisa ako ndani kicommercials na nobody seems to share her paralysis so nobody knows.Nikaambia yeye pia mimi nikona paralysis ya namna hiyo and that its a natural phenomena na itaisha with time.
The following day on Monday, practice ilikua on kama kawaida.Nimefika late kidogo due to a late class presentation na kwa papara nikaanza kuunganisha mitambo.Then i heard that voice hitting high notes.She talked different from how she sang.Its as if she had two voices.Reminds me of an elder here who once joked that akona dieks mbili.One for chewing the khupipi choti moja na iyo nyengine ya kupepeta prewall soft nyakez choti tatu mzito mzito.
There she was,wrapped in a wollen orange trench coat,buttoned kama economy ya Kenya;bottom all the way up.Tulikutanisha macho kidogo and I swear she corked her head,raised an eyebrow and gave me the âBetty Kyalo ule malaya crooked smileâ all in the span of a millisecond.
Practice over.Nadisconnect mitambo.Wanakwaya wanapiga gumzo leaving at their own pleasure and speed.Jua lishatua.Darkness is slowly creeping in.Lavender.Old spices.The scents penetrate my nostrils interchangeably and I instinctivey turn.
Nikiwaambia i almost knocked her down nitakua nimepiga exaggeration.But i came face to face with her.Her face was afew inches from mine.You know what she did?Yes.She corked her head sideways,raised an eyebrow and gave me that Betty Kyalo ule malayaâs crooked smile.
She knew it had an effect on me because she turned around and went to her office.
Nilimfuata.Hahaa.Banged the door behind me and sat on the same chair as jana.Lights are off.I canât see her clearly.I am tensed.Nimekuja hapa kufanya nini by the way?Nikaanza kujishangaa.Maybe ninamisinterprete signals.I get fidgety.Naanza kujihukumu.But before nijitie msalabani,she breaks the monotone.
âCanât you be a good kid and talk to momma ?â
Now this woman is damn flirtatious.Nimepatana na many womenz lakini no one comes close to her.I honestly canât match her humour so I go for a shadow.
âI thought momma is wise enough to interpret her kidâs silence and offer a breast.â That was a good one brethren.
Her laughter was hearty.She was perplexed by the comeback.She switched on the lights and looked at me.Corking her head sideways,she raised an eyebrow and gave me the signature Betty Kyalo ule malayaâs crooked smile.
"You are naughty"She says reclining on her chair.
"I suppose siko pekeangu hapa."I counter quickly.
The sexual tension was hanging low in the room.The conversation wasnât sexual but if tension had smell,iyo ofisi ingekua inanuka burning tyres.She stood up,went round the desk and sat on it.To put it into perspective,amekalia meza mbele yangu ilhali mimi nimekalia kiti.Her trenchcoat opens afew buttons from the bottom.Ata si thigh naona.Magoti tu.Wenye washafanikiwa kutafuna indians ama the clean and very consevative muslims can attest that magoti imefichwa kwa muda is really arousing.Colour ya mandazi yenye hijaiva properly.
Up above the slight parting nikaona thighs smooth.melanini defficient kama a new bornâs butt.My Abdalla was up and running.Was this shit really happening or was I imagining it?
I donât know what broke the sexual tension or rather what accentuated it until our lips met.Fireworks wadau.But she didnât let it last.Uyu alikua anataka shtik tu.Nilitolewa toja vile nyani huvua ndizi maganda.Quick and precise.Her skin was burning.Her cheeks were flushed and pinkish.Her complexion was really light.
Being the boobies nigga that i am nikaendea jeggies.I mean.what do you expect a 36 year old chidless woman to have on her chest?.Nothing but two huge funbags with erect nipolos.Vitu zimesimama tisti defying gravity.
Its saddening that hakunipea time ya kuzifanyia justice ju she climbed on her desk,hiked her skirt up and with the tenderest and the yearnings of eyes akanitazama akihema.Thurware ilikua ni ile ya kata kundu so i just pushed it to one side.That is the only poocie nishawai test wetness na anything apart from kidole.It was just evident.The lips were swollen na juices zilikua zinaooze hadi kwa desk.
The sight was erotic guys.Very erotic.Trench coat imetupwa uko,bra na top nowhere to be seen.Only her skirt was on the waist,panty to one side her kuch kuch glistening like a disturbed snail.Her eyes waiting,yearning.Shetani akafanya ile kitu.Nikamwaga before niingize omozigidi.
Nikamwagia yeye lita sigisti seven kwa mapaja.Fu**k shetan.What the hell.
One thing,older women have decorum when it comes to intercourse.They make you feel good despite being an asshole.She made some silly jokes about it,stripped of the panties and dropped down the skirt.Akavaa blouse na trenchcoat bra na pantie akaweka kwa handbag na akaniambia twende Kisumu.
Ata before tupull out of the parking lot my sedes was up.I stroked her all the way to Kisumu,just afew kms away.Kucheck in kwa hoteli teketeke and as she climbed the stairs infront of me the sight of that pantiless ass was too much.Tuliingia room tu hivi kama amechora saba.Wacha tu niseme whatever happened there cemented our bond that would span more than 3 years.Ata job yangu ya kwanza ni yeye aliniconnect.Not forgetting that campus niliishi maisha nyororo courtesy of her.No regrets whatsoever.
She was medically proven inconceivable so hakuna stress ya kumwaga ndani.Mzee nayo miaka ilikua imesonga na ED inasumbua yeye so poosie was always as fresh as it comes.Kupanga mechi ilikuanga ngumu but we managed.
N/B Nimewacha essential details nje ju ya kuficha identity and tried to fictionize it as much as possible due to the same reasons.Enjoy.