Masood the Arorr intelectual

The Tugen are a subtribe of the greater Kalenjin tribe. They are one of the smallest subtribes and live in very harsh climatic conditions when compared to their Nandi and Kipsigis cousins. Mzee Moi was the mosr famous son of the Tugen.

The Tugen have 3 main subdivisions: the Samor,the Aror and the Lembus.

The Aror are found in Baringo North. They are rumoured to eat rats and are said to be very enterprising. Among famous Arors are William Cheptumo, John Lokorio,William Boit, Andrew Kiptoon and Willy Kamuren.

It was 2007 and i was a student at a local University. Elections were around the corner and campaigns were in top gear. One evening i was invited to a meeting at YMCA near the University of Nairobi. The meeting was to be adressed by “our” aspiring MP Hon. lokorio who was Mzee Mois aide for a long time and was still serving him in retirement. I knew there was some good cash to be made.

I rushed to the venue and after sweettalking one of the oragnizers i was allowed to attend despite coming from another tribe.

I was given a fake name of Wilson Rotich from a place called Osen. Despite being light skinned i was now an Arror Intellectual by virtue of being an Arror student.

I took a seat near the back of the hall at the YMCA premises and sat silently. The ODM wave was very strong all over the Rift Valley but i knew that Lokorio had received good backing from Mzee Moi and i wanted to taste some of that cash.

Lokorio arrived and we all stood up and welcomed him. We had a word of prayer and we then introduced ourselves. I stood up Introduced myself as Wilson arap Rotich from Osen. The leadership gave some welcoming remarks and gave the floor to Lokorio. He told us the Halls he had lived in at the UoN and proceeded to set out his vision for Baringo North. He claimed that he had been to Israel and learnt alot about dryland agriculture. He said Honey would be a key agricultural product and asked how many of us were from Osen. All this time he was looking at me. I feared to raise my hand as he may have asked me a question that would expose i was an impostor.

He also said that Luos worship Omieri and cannot lead(Hatespeech).
He then said he would be appointed a minister and he would employ only his people. He also said that incase balance was needed he would give 10 Arors to Sunkuli and Sunkuli would give him 10 Maasais for appointment. He was assuming both he and Sunkuli would win and be appointed ministers by Kibaki who would have also won.

He then invited questions and comments. Some few enemies of development told him how strong ODM wave was and advised him to shift camps. Some went on to discredit his candidature. He then lifted a brown manilla bag full of cash. He told us there was 120,000 there. The leadership assured him of support and escorted him.

I quickly lined up to receive my share of the cash. When it was my turn to get the cash the cashier asked me in kalenjin "Imyeno. I told him i was very fine as i smiled coyly and took my Ksh. 2000. Kumbe imyeno means where are you from.

The loot afforded me a good life for a few weeks as i looked for more politicians to harvest from.

Remind me to tell you what happened when we tried to milk one Frederick Omulo Gumo aka Baba pius.

Postscript, many years later i would be involved in training the Baringo County Assembly leadership. I met Joseph Makilap who was very light despite coming from Baringo North. We became good friends.He was an MCA for Barwessa ward and was tipped to become MP until Kanu shafted him. One day Baringo North will have a brown MP and Masood will go to enjoy CDF tenders.
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Barwessa borders Bartabwa? Huko network Huwa story.

HIYO ya gumo ifuate sheria plz… meaning ikuje na hata kama ni sketch

Lakini kuliendaje wakamkataza ticket ya Kanu. I thought he would defeat cheptumo?

Kanu is giddys property, he dishes it to the biggest ass licker.

Reminds me of a day i had only bus fare in my pockets. I had only a few slices of bread smeared with margarine and chocolate bila milk. I passed by a restaurant and saw guys lining up for buffet. I went in and quietly observed kumbe it was a birthday luncheon for a fella. I took a plate, piled food on my plate and chose a table near the door. After a while the doors were closed and we ate noisily. Nikaona bahasha zinazungushwa kila mtu akachukua. Guys were putting money into the envelopes. I bid my time till guys sitting in my table wakaamka wote nikapaka mate and i sealed the bloody thing. Kila mtu alikuwa anaamka na kupelekea birthday boy akijitambulisha. Most were workmates, relatives and close friends. I took my envelope and told him we were friends way back when we lived in the same estate. Guy hesitated a little bit na akienda kuuliza swali nikamwambia kwanza amalize na watu we will catch up later. Nilirudi kwa meza waited for a while and then feigned a call. I slithered out into the streets and walked away. Thank you Allan and your insurance agency colleagues for the free meal

:D:D Haribu jina jenga mwili budah

:DHio ya Gumo unleash, nakumbuka nikiskia fununu kumbe it was true?

:D:D:D:D:D:D

:D:D:D:D:D:D

I hope you now afford your own good food. Nice one :D:D:D:D:D

Even more than that