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CHARACTERISTICS OF NAIROBI ESTATES:

Nairobi Estates Analysed, See Who Lives Where. This information is more important for newcomers, since rural-urban migration in Kenya is at 60% today despite devolution being in place:-

  1. UMOJA – All alcoholics live here, in fact there are more bars in Umoja than shops.

  2. ZIMMERMAN – Majority of strippers and single mothers live here.

  3. MAKONGENI, KALOLENI, JERICHO, MBOTELA, BAHATI
    ETC ETC – All those utahama lini children live here, as for girls, they have 3 or 4 children and they still live with their parents.

  4. DANDORA, KAYOLE, HURUMA – Role models here are thugs and conductors, infact here the more you get arrested the bigger your celebrity status. The more cat shoes and silver chains you wear …the more your celebrity status. Hapa disco matanga za wezi ni daily.

  5. KARIOBANGI – The home of all counterfeits, they are so good at this that they even made their own currency…BAN GLA PESA!!!

  6. EASTLEIGH – You can buy anything you want here, they are so good they can clone your mother as long as you have cash. Lakini mbom mbom everywhere.

  7. KIBERA – Hooligans, fanatics, Ushamba, anything negative resides here. Hapa kila mtu najuwa ‘rights’ zake.

  8. KAWANGWARE – Home of busaa and very tight security as all the neighbours are in the security industry – ni masoja (Watchmen).

  9. NGARA – Student centre ……hapa ukitaka kuona and kukatia dem Masai, borana, somali utapata ….students everywhere.

  10. PIPELINE – Majority work in industrial area.

  11. BURUBURU, KOMAROCK, DONHOLM, SOUTH B, SOUTH C – All these are Runda wannabes. Hapa kisungu ni mingi na mtu akiingia kwa nyumba anaongea broken swahili ama Mother tongue.
    Gays, lesbians and all who women who kill young men reside here.

  12. ROYSAMBU, KASARANI, KAHAWA WEST, KAHAWA WENDANI – University students on part time jobs and those who have just landed their first jobs reside here. In fact, there are more bedsitters and single rooms here than there is bed capacity in all Universities in East and Central Africa combined.

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Sijaona mtaa yangu hapo

Mbona watu wa kayole tunadharauliwa hivi. Yaani hata kwa Gazeti mtaoneshwa watu wamefarikiki ama shida. Isorait, haina mambo.

PIPELINE-The closest the Kamba can come to the city.

:D:D

pia naona mtaa yangu hapo

Where is @vuja de in all this

[SIZE=1]niko hapa[/SIZE]

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Mitaa yangu iko wapi? Mitaa?