his happened a few years back. I was hunting on Badoo back when Badoo was still the shit and I got one of the many ‘hi’ messages. It was some chic called Naomi. I Went to the profile for vetting. She wasn’t that good looking so I knew that was an easy pussy. Some many moons later, we arranged a meet. Mimi huyo drove to Eldy coz she was in Moi.
God sometimes has jokes. I mean, when I say she wasn’t good looking. SHE WASN"T GOOD LOOKING. She had that ashy-like dark skin, her teeth were all over the place, her forehead looked like it wasn’t meant for her face. Long natural hair though but who looks at hair!! Below the neck was a whole different story. Her body was not that dark, it’s as if she bleached her body a little bit, just a little bit and forgot her face. She was about 5’4’’ with the slimmest, most beautiful waist you’ve ever seen. The ass was just right, it fitted those jeans perfectly, not so big not so small, just right. Her hands were just beautiful to look at and play with. They were tiny and extremely soft with well maintained short milky nails. That’s when I knew, yup, I’m definitely hitting this. We got drunk, got a room and tried to fuck. It was terrible. First, her pussy was too hairy for my liking. Secondly, my D just couldn’t fit!! I was like, “Are you a virgin.” “Hell no,” she replied with her fake American accent. So that night went terrible but I’m not one to just give up, I needed a rematch and this time around I was prepared. Best of all I was in my own turf, Nakuru.
She showed up at my doorstep on a Friday evening but nothing happened that night coz we went out and got drunk and I wanted her as sober as possible, this was serious business. The next day sato, went to work, came back in the evening armed with lub to the core. I’ve never seen my house that clean. The aroma was amazing coz this chic could cook, she could probably cook stones and you won’t know they’re stones. Everything was clean and just in place which got me even honier. She was wearing nothing but my shirt which hugged that katiny body just perfectly with that apple booty just popping out just a little, you know the one that sends shivers down your spine. Jumping forward after dinner and everything, we started watching a movie. 10 minutes into it I was in action. Obviously, I couldn’t kiss her for long coz maneuvering around her teeth become a bit tricky and also I didn’t want to keep looking at her face, that would turn me off so I decided my journey will start from the neck down. I kissed her neck and proceeded down to her boobs, those beautiful, beautiful boobs. It was like squeezing two huge smooshy apples with pointy ends. In fact, the nipples were so pointy I could feel them pricking my tongue. I set up camp there for a while and I could tell she loved it coz the breathing got heavier and heavier. Actually, come to think of it, in my list of boobs, those boobs are ranked in my top three. So back to it, I obviously couldn’t camp on her boobs forever even though I wanted to, so I headed down her belly licking her belly button (the dirtiest part in a human body). Her breathing was getting even heavier a sign for me to continue along that path. I then started to proceed to my favorite parts, the clit and pussy. I had previously used my virgonometer (middle finger) to check if the pussy had been shaved and sure enough it had been shaved clean, my tongue was about to make it even cleaner. I was headed to glory and she stops me halfway claiming oh sijui I’ve never been licked down there before and I don’t think I’m comfortable with it.
Listen here, in all my years as a pussyologist with a PhD (pussy handling degree) and MD on the side (Mad Dick) I have come to learn one thing, pussy eating is the best foreplay a man can ever have. Most chics think we eat pussy coz we want to please them, HELL NO!! Pussy eating is for me not for you, it’s like eating ice cream. As long as the pussy is clean, it has to be eaten, PERIOD!
So we wasted a few vital seconds there debating if I should eat the pussy or not and we finally concluded that I should proceed to eat the pussy but with caution coz she was feeling thithi (ticklish that is) and boy did I eat the pussy. See, the secret to eating pussy is so simple, just do the alphabet over and over or you can spell your name and your exes names or spell Victoria Rubadiri’s name again and again. So I started from A on the clit and by the time I was hitting J, she came so hard she locked my head between her thighs and gave out a soft squeak. That was so damn hot so definitely, I had to see that again so I proceeded to the pussy and started from A again. See, she had those good-looking baby pussy (not that I’m a pedophile but that’s what they’re called. Google baby pussy xxx and you’ll see what I mean). You all know how ugly 99.5% of Kenyan pussy looks like, this was cute. I ate that pussy like no one’s business and she came countless times and every time she would clench my head between her thighs and give out that kasoft squeak, one of the sexiest things I’ve ever heard.
Now, remember, all this time I haven’t brought in the major players in the game yet, my lub and my D. So I took the lub (edible) and poured it all over the top of her pussy and started rubbing the shit out of that clit and gently fingering that pussy with my virgonometer. My intention was to make her squirt but you need two fingers for that and that would have been hard with that tiny pussy so my virgonometer had to do the heavy load.
Let me just take a second here and tell you something about that pussy. Her pussy was short for lack of a better word. Let me explain what I mean. You know how when you’re fingering a pussy and you have to struggle to the point of breaking your finger so as to reach that kalump thingy at the very back of the pussy so as to stroke it? Well, this pussy was not like that, that kalump thingy was right there, finger length and so it was so easy and no muscle pool. The poor thing was cumming constantly.
It was about time I tagged in my D, he had been on the sideline for too long. Since I had decided ages ago I’m going dry fry (trust me, no one was hitting that), CD was not a barrier at this point. Damn that pussy!! Now, imagine fucking a CocaCola bottle with a top that can expand and retract, that’s how the pussy was. It was like the pussy had fingers and was gripping tightly to my D, it was just perfect … Okay, this was how good the pussy was, my intention at first was to do this rematch like a championship title then hit the road never to be seen again, but the moment I entered that pussy, I knew for a fact I was going to be hitting that for the best part of the year.
Being the regional chairman of Pornhub at that time, I had a few tricks up my sleeve and the poor thing didn’t know what’s about to hit her. Round one was as if she was in a porn movie audition. Being so light and short made everything so easy, (actually nowadays I prefer petite with an ass of course) I carried her all over the living room in every seat and not taking even a single break. It’s funny coz carrying a 13 kg gas to the car which is just outside the door I have to make two stops, but I was carrying her all over without feeling even a muscle pinch. The poor thing was so tired I had to finish so I can give her a breather.
For those of us who have PhDs and MDs on the side know that 1st round is always a practice round, so getting tired with a PhD holder in the first round is asking for trouble.
In her mind, the poor thing thought I was done and that was it for the night, she didn’t know I was just testing the waters. I carried her to bed for round two obviously squeezing those melons on the way there. Round two was as if I was told I had a terminal disease and I had hours to live, I hit that thing proper. The poor thing had her eyes rolled at the back of her head, all you could hear was the heavy breathing and a squeak when she cums. Let me educate some of you ignorant people here who don’t have a PhD yet. When you’re hitting it and the chic is screaming and making some loud unnecessary noise, YOU ARE NOT DOING SHIT!! But when she’s quiet with her hands gripping hard on the sheets, her toes clenched so hard you could feel them cracking, her breathing so irregular she’s trying to catch a breath, and her eyes rolling all over, that’s when you know you’re hitting the right spots.
The poor thing cum so many times she started saying, “I can’t cum anymore.” At first, it was music to my ears until I realized she really couldn’t cum anymore literally and it was getting painful for her so I had to sacrifice my pussy cum. I went to the bathroom, wanked the cum off and took a shower. I came back to bed, the poor thing was dead asleep.
After that weekend, I hit that thing for the best part of that year. She was the best student I ever had, I taught her how to suck dick with finesse like a proper lady and boy did she learn well. I taught her how to ride, some Pornhub positions like cow girl, standing 69, wheelbarrow etc members know what I’m talking about. Actually, some of the things I do now I trained with her. So, I continued hitting for a few months but had to cut it short when she started posting stuff on Facebook ati “That was an awesome weekend with my boyfriend.” What the fuck you mean boyfriend bitch, its FWB. Say it with me… F W B. Boyfriend my foot.
I saw on FB she got hooked to some look-alike Kisii guy and they had a baby who was dark from the get got, the kid looked like a black doll. Then there was this time she hit me up ati if we could hook up!! No fucking way, I know that mkisii man has nyanyuad that pussy viserious. For the ladies, I hear giving a Kisii man you’re not going to marry pussy is like taking a monster dildo and just ramming it on your pussy every single day, just ramming it and ramming it, ramming all the lubrication and sweetness out of that pussy coz they’re after spoiling it, nothing else. I think it must be the avocados or maybe bananas or sugar cane. I mean, I don’t know coz I don’t have a pussy, it’s what I hear.
Naomi, poor thing. God was so unfair to you, He gave you the body of Victoria Rubadiri and Wetangula’s face (I have a serious crush on Victoria to a point I think I could wank and cum easily very while she’s reading some sad news about a terrorist attack in Mandera). But anyways, now that I’m older I’m thinking maybe I should have washed the face a little bit. Have you seen Vera’s old photos? I don’t mean plastic or too much makeup, just some powder here, a bit of fair and lovely over there, grind the teeth a little bit or chop off half of it and put braces.
POOR THING!!