Sugar Mummy Tales

Kuna huyu sugarmummy amekuwa akiniharass kwa FB messenger. We did hung out a couple of times in 2016. So I knew what she wanted. But after Le Boy child president kutushow turesist slay queens, I added huyo mathe hapo kwa list for the simple reason the cost-benefit analysis ilikuwa negative. Hiyo ni stori ya siku ingine.

Two weeks down the road after pestering me, we met at George’s (Nax) around 7:30 pm. For me, it was just a meet and greet thing as we hadn’t met in like a year and some months. So nkajua tutapart ways in kedo 30 minutes. Venye alifika akadai hakuwa ametake lunch. I beckoned the waitress akachukua order ya pork choma na sembe. I didn’t want to eat so nkaitisha Stoney baridi tho alikuwa anataka we do Red Label. In no uncertain terms nikamshow, I don’t drink on weekdays. (If you don’t say Ay…hapa the No’s have it.)

After devouring hiyo meal, akadai anataka Guarana. Baada ya kumimina cans, akansongea na kunshika mkono. Wewe, hujanmiss? Hapo nikajifanya sijaskia any. It was around nine na Rubadiri alikuwa akisoma news. I told her I had to pick stuff kadhaa Tuskys supa. But I realized alikuwa akibuy time ndo tuende away match. Hiyo siku I was stubborn her plans fell through.

Meeting Two…

I was in town doing some errands baada ya works on Thursday. So nikaingia @Courtyard nikachapa shots mbili za Vicerory ma Coke nikicharge simu. Nikachomoa simu na kucheck Whatsapp messages. Message ya Sugarmummy ikaingia.Since I was kinda bored, nasikutaka kufika kejani early, nikamshow tunaeza meet Sting Grill and Bar around 8.00pm. So I left courtyard teketeke hadi Sting.

Venye niliingia nikamwona kwa restaurant. I didn’t stop to say hi. Nilipita kama gari ya miraa na kubeckon na mkono twende upstairs kwa bar. Baada ya salamz, nkamshow I want to be outta here by 9.00pm but tunaeza meet Sato. Pia ye akadai we should leave before hiyo time coz alikuwa anatravel very early on Friday.

The first agenda ilikuwa supper. I wasn’t hungry. So akaitisha Kuku na fries na akateremsha na Guarana mbili. I just took Stoney as I don’t do drinks weekdays. We talked and all along I reminded her I want to leave before 9pm.

After downing hizo guarana mbili, akaitisha ya tatu. I paid the bills akichapa ya tatu. Hapo nikafanya cost-benefit analysis nkaona hapa ni kubaya. I had like 3k. 50% imeishia food na guarana. Nikamshow amalize drink tujikate. I was supposed to pick supplies kwa Supa. So akainsist anipeleke with 5 minutes to close. Lucky, I got there in nick of time na kupick a few things. Vile tukatoka akadai twende kwake. It was around 10pm. I told her no. Can’t go, Friday nko works. Nkamshow a request Wasili cab coz phone yangu ilikuwa imeishaa charge.

Tulikuwa hapo kwa entrance so nkasonga kando tukingoja cab ifike. Hapo akaona amepata chance ya kubargain. Twende then kesho nipe company out of town. I told her that can’t work. I was relieved vile Taxi ilifika. I jumped in nkamdrop kwake then cab ikanfikisha kejani. I paid and called it a day.

Baada hiyo two encounters, I swore never ever to see that SM again.

Sugar mummy nà wewe ndio unalipa bill?

ukaacha kuma moto bila kuizima

That is just an older kunguru not a sugar mummy. You are literally her meal ticket.

Hiyo concept ya sugar mummy flew right over your head.

Google the meaning of sugar mummy. :meffi::meffi::meffi::meffi:

:D:D:D Plus he insists he does not drink on weekdays, guess Thursdays is now a weekend when he states, “So nikaingia @Courtyard nikachapa shots mbili za Vicerory ma Coke nikicharge simu”. Maybe it was an attempt at humor that I missed.

He comes across as being bored with her pussy but enjoys the little tug of war/attention that the kunguru subjects him after every meal requesting they go for a romp.:smiley:

:D:D:D:D:D

trying to make herself relevant to be assured of future bacon and ugali

if you ever get to check her phone ,chances are that you will see your contact saved as ‘food’

Wtf! Wewe na wale mafala wakutuma fare hakuna tafauti.

sugar mummy na wewe ndo unalipa bill??
did i miss something

You need prayers my brother. How on earth can you sponsor a sugar mummy at any given time? Secondly, if she was an old prostitute, which is most likely, how can you waste all that time and money on her when you would have finished business on the first day of your meeting and close that chapter for good?

he was not in it “for the business”, apparently.

But apparently he had some interest in her!

Kweli hio ni Hungry Hippo

You are most likely a school boy on holiday fantasizing.

Get your definitions of kunguru, singomatha, poko and sugar mummy sorted and rewrite your insha.

You can use the Ktalk Lexicon.

Mbwa ghasia takataka. Chieth uwesmakende. Umechanganyikiwa kama Tulaga ikiona mizigo.

so what is the moral of your story…HUMWBER

@SealTeam254 Last seen at 06:15Hrs. Did not even wait to see the reaction. Alijua hii story is more waiganjo than waiganjo mwenyewe. But he could also have a another handle that is cursing why he wrote this fantasy…