Swiping Redefined

Wadau kuna katabia flani nilikuwa nimejizoesha nikiwa bachelor … Nikiwa nimepika kanyama kangu kaquarter halafu nimepakua tu poa…sasa kuna ile spup huwa imebakia kwa hiyo sufuria baada ya kuserve … that is it … hata nikijaribu kujizuia aje I usually found myself with an urge to ensure not even a single millimetre of the soup goes to waste just like that! So prior to devouring the main meal, nilikuwa nachuna kaugali kiasi which I could then use to wipe the sufuria clean halafu naikula in what I used to refer to as “swiping”. There is some sort of exhilirating self-satisfaction I used to get through swiping i.e. no matter how hard I tried to restrain myself I usually found myself nikirudi kitchen to swipe. I had even perfected the art to the extent that the sufuria ended up with a clean, shiny lustre that could put any utensil cleaning detergent to shame! Using a tiny mound of ugali, I could skillfully and meticulously accomplish the act in one mighty arc that cleaned every square millimetre of the sufuria sparkling clean. This is a skill I intend to patent very soon… I can swipe a small sufuria and a giant one too…imagine!..in just one single swipe!..najua wasee wa ku-swipe ni wengi but are not brave enough to raise their hand like me. What other queer behaviors have come across as a bachelor?

What in God’s good world have I just read?[ATTACH=full]150259[/ATTACH]

Hiyo mambo hakuna mtu hafanyangi. Its especially done when cooking stew with ugali, not rice, not chapati not anything but ugali. So satisfying. Anyway, story ya mabachelor, kuna beshte yangu fulani alikuwa mzembe sana kuosha vyombo. So anytime he uses the chopping board, haoshi. The next time akitumia anageuza hiyo pande ingine. I used to find it very irritating.

Hope you don’t wipe your ass with just one swipe.

Wamama wa Kilimani wakisoma hii, watakutafuta uwa-swipe ikus!

nisaidie hiyo ruler ya kupima soup.

The swipe team. Unaanza nayo kabla main meal.

kama nadai ka quarter, nanunua ya 50 bob ili nisikweke mfupa…ofcos 2 diff butcheries

Masaibu ya sufferers :D:D nacheka juu najiona nikifanya hivyo

Thought the hekaya would end you wiped the whole sufuria clean with the whole zembe without noticing umemaliza zembe without meat.

can relate that veeeery well

gay thread

He he,nyama ya 50 si utajipata na zile nyama mabaki zile huwa kwa butchery

Well… then patent the act i can see you’re already a professional at it

:D:D:D:D:D typical bachelor thing…I hope vile sasa umeoa husneak kwa kitchen kuswipe chini ya maji,

Nikiwa bachelor kakuota ilikua inaishia kwa moto. Kuonja onja kama imeiva would lead to devouring rice with soup

Niliinvite rafiki yangu mmoja tukiwanga college at least kupunguza budget ndo nibaki na dough ya kupunguza stress weekend… quarter kg of meat disappeared ndani ya skuma ya ten bob. The only way one could tell there was meat therein is through the faint taste of soup that could be felt. Ninja blamed it on weed… had to call it quits at trial stage and ran before I was malnourished.

Sometimes I used to Kula nyama straight from kasufuria. That way only sinia ya ugali na sufuria na mwiko would need cleaning :smiley:

:smiley: Ii ni noma aiseeh

Pale campus tulikuwa tunapika pamoja, Meru guy, a current mca and I . We had a schedule where siku yako ikifika, you cook and make calls to the other to wake wale. All was well for weeks until ikafika siku moja ikawa ni Kama unga inatembea haraka but kipimo Cha sima kimepungua. Siku moja tukicheza pool pale common room, nikasho.mmeru Kuna venue siku hizi naumia given he was my roommate huyo mca alikuwa to anadandia kupika . The guy pia shared my sentiments. Tukaamua hatutakuwa tunategea call. Masaa ikifika, nikuvuka kejani. Siku moja duty ya yule mca, tukaamua kwenda to virandom. Kumbe yule kabwela alikiwa anapika sima,anachota kiasi na kuisonga ile shape ya mlima so that no one notices imepunguzwa ndio anapigia raia simu waje wale.