The Ultimate Kenyan Father

Mark Maish

Village Elder
#1
#ThisIsMyStory Whenever I see my dad I hug him he always asks me, "Mbona unanihug na hatuwezi kosa kuongea mara kama fifty kwa siku? Umefanya nini?" Well, my old man is like that. He constantly thinks I'm in trouble and he is the fixer of my life. See, my dad and I have been through a lot together. I was in class 8 when my mum was diagnosed with cancer back in 2006. It was tough for the both of us. It was tougher on him though.

He rarely talked to me about what he was going through but I saw he was struggling to keep it together. We would go without food for days in the house, but never did I complain because I knew mum was coming back soon to us. Some days he would leave me at my grandparents place so that he could go stay with my mum during chemotherapy sessions. Sometimes days turned to weeks.

Whenever I saw him I would hug him tight and ask, "Umekuja na mum? Ako kwa gari?" most times he would ignore my questions and hug me tighter. After my KCPE, I went to some camp in Murang'a after saving for it for months. I would borrow a phone from my friends to call dad but whenever he picked it up and heard my voice he would hang up. I wondered what I had done wrong.

On 8th Dec 2006 one of the moderators called me, told me to pack my bags for I was needed home. So many thoughts were running through my mind. When I arrived home, there were tents all over, so many cars, so many people. What was going on? Is mum back home? Where is dad? Where is mum?

Many people came to hug me, but all I wanted to see was either mum or dad. My aunts were all over me saying pole. But where is mum? I want to see dad... Finally one of my aunts took me to my dad. Sigh, there is my dad, but where is mum? Mum must be in the kitchen cooking. Asking dad where she was, he hugged me so tight crying. Well, that was an emotional welcome but my question wasn't answered. Where is mum? Dad took me to my room, told me the sad news that God had called mum.

“Si uambie mungu mum hawezi kaa na yeye, mum ni wetu? ", I replied.

Dad broke down and he hugged me again and whispered, “Mum hatawahi rudi."

We both cried. I ran out and went to the kitchen to confirm she wasn’t there. I looked everywhere but I couldn't find her, everybody around me started crying. I was stranded, I need to find mum now. The next thing I remember I was in my bed. Dad was asleep at the lower bunker bed. I woke him up and asked him what happened. He told me I had passed out. I was out for almost 5 hours. Then I clearly remember him saying, "Rugi, siendi Mahali, ata ukiwa mkubwa na ukiwa na watoto, ntakuwa hapa hapa."

Fast forward, dad has kept his word. One of the fewest people in my life who have kept their word. It's been rough. We have both fought depression. We've been through thick and thin but we've always stuck together. I've made so maaaaaany mistakes, I've made poor decisions in life but he's my speed dial 2. He has never failed to receive my calls. Being a single mum is, let's say one of the most wonderful poor decisions I've made but he's been with me through every step of the way.

I owe my dad my life, he is my rock, my superman and my best friend. We don't have a perfect relationship but we have an awesome one that I must say.

Though he is authoritative and tough, he is the kindest, caring and down to earth guy I have ever met. He always insists on meeting my friends, people I interact with, work with because he wants the best for me and whoever my dad's dislikes he says it clearly and with no remorse and those that he approves, he tells me, "Huyo ni mtu mzuri sana."

My dad has a small circle of friends. He has repeatedly told me that not everybody who claims to be your friend is your friend. Keep your circle small, trust a few, obey your instincts and be yourself.

PS: #ThisIsMyStoryCampaign lets you open up, anonymously, about your struggles & how you deal with them. To take part, send your story to markmaina76@gmail.com.

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#MarkMaish #TheBrokeBillionaire
 
#13
Mi I donno how people talk to their dads. I always mumble shit when I am with him. I have always had an open r/ship with my mums though.

Maybe that is why I find people who are tight with their dads to be weird.
 

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