Toenails

So you are in a hurry to dress up and go to work and you notice that your toenails are overgrown again and in need of some attention. you put it at the back of your mind until a day like today when you have some time. you take a shower, come sit on the bed with an array of tools; your six nailcutters (each one bought the last time you discovered that the big toenail did not fit in the gap of the one you had) and the big pair of scissors…
You put your foot on the edge of the bed (because you caanot bed comfortably to reach the foot on the ground because of the bread basket!) and go to work with the scissors, but you discover the nail is too hard and you are hurting the the thumb and finger holding the scissors. you are also a little breathless because the katambi that has growing unnoticed is getting in the way so cannot reach the foot very comfortably…
You support the toe with the left hand as you put in what you consider your last but strongest attempt. SNAP!, the toenail goes. Phew, you just missed slicing away your left index finger by millimetres too. You look at the results and you have this jagged toenail stump glaring at you that simply cannot be left that way. you try smoothening it out with the scissors, this time trying to keep the lucky index finger as well out of the way as it is practical. but the scissors keep sliding away from the stubborn nail (apparently they were not called nails for nothing-remember that idiom hard as nails? they must have had the big toenail in mind!). you take one of the nailcutters and start chipping away, bit by bit, with occasional breathing breaks, until you conclude that the nail is in a reasonable shape. now for the left toenail…
Forty-five minutes later you realise you have a thin film of sweat…but the nails look good, you tell yourself. And they will be good for another six months…
Are there products out there to soften the toenails before the cutting? or nailcutters with a gap big enough to accommodate thhe big toenail?

Village birrionaires spare us the comment that you cannot relate because you get your pedicures in special-purpose salons… we don’t have them in Nyeri…

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Mzee unasumbua,Merry Christmas[ATTACH=full]73510[/ATTACH]

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:D:D:D:D:DMerry Christmas too…[SIZE=1]ai, hata kama ni daktari ali-prescribe hiyo diet it looks awful[/SIZE]…

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Proteins rich food sir,you should try it to reach ktalk threshold:D:D

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My good friend, Mrs gashwin (@Guru), should be taking care of this. You dont have to worry.

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If i am ever served this i will find the closest cliff and jump off it. Hizo ni omena na chapati…jehofffaah!!

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Love is…
…doing each other’s nails.

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nini hii unatuekea lunch time

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@Kasighau hutumia metal grinder?

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Mzee Gashui kwani uko na kucha za Crocodile?

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:D:D:D

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Nimesema mara ngapi mimi @Kasighau si @mabenda4 jamaneni. That is the guy with talons for nails. Sheki muguu yangu…very soft
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@gashwin , jaribu ku-soak mguu kwa maji with a little glycerine.

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It’s very gay for a man to describe the process of cutting his nails to such details

:D:D:Dwhy are you being funny? I can bet with my left ball that io socks conceals a crocodile…:D:D

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kcuf you. isn’t it gayer to think sex after reading a health post?

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get yourself one of these bad boys

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We live apart but I will have in my schedule next time he visit.

Gashui, it’s outright now we are in that age of ‘doing’ one another.

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;):wink:

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Pa

Pancakes na omena?

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Its official now. @Kasighau has the worst form of dementia and parkinsons combined. Jana tu ulidai when that when you were @mabenda4 there is a mboch you nyanduad for two days before she left for home and four years later mama Cess akajipata na ‘mimi ndio bibi mkubwa’ mama Fan. Ningekutusi but wacha tu…

@Guru doing @gashwin on demand or on schedule?

@gashwin Nyiri kwina mbura?

@pamba afande hiyo chakula umeweka hapo…just roll the chapati with the omena inside. Sweetest snack ever…

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