I was working for IOM dadaab as a T-shelter supervisor kwa wale hawajui hii ni nyumba ambayo ni ghetto house upgraded juu it consists of juala for walling na same for roof simply its a shack but being poor they were ready to offer anything including slice for one to acquire this five star building and the lady was no different .
I easily passed for a “Mushunguli” which is the Somali word for woria nywele ngumu a character appearance that has lived to haunt me several times but that’s a story for another day she puls me said and asks if I will sip athes or mbiges in short chai ya maziwa na sturungi I opt for sturungi since camel milk instantly purchases me a ferari and converts me to a driver I see in her face that she has pressing issues but we can only stare at each other since am yet to learn kiwaria so we only look at each other but she is sending messages but she offers to teach me the language on condition that I’ll not miss my classes this goes on for a week and I can now master a few sentences in it.well it goes on until she tells me why not marry a somal lady I mockingly tell her why not find me one but I have to sample first before she tells me why look for someone while she is there surprisingly she doesn’t wear dhera and gubis any more she sways her hips like my sister from matungulu hills and from the cloths waria wear they lack lining and majority don’t know anything called kifuniko ya asali as a hawker once convinced me anauza kifuniko ya asali only to pay for panties when expecting something so I could see thigh land even the cooomer was visible but a overcame the situation but I had to pay for the lessons either by building her a tshelter or tasting the slice I chose the letter since nobady will ever know and I was convinced that its going to be two f instead of four is find flater fuck and forget this is going to be fuck and forget since the first two are carted for.we set the day on a Friday when everymalee has gone to mosque so when the day breaks I know am going to eat slice ya woria and I wake up early but kisiran gets up squarely on me when am told there has been an explosion at Bosnia market and hence no movement I swallow that bitter pill and say I’ll go on a matatu at 1000hrs I board a matatu but things get kisiranicated when it doesn’t fill by 1120 so I opt to pay private to Dagahale we start but after two km things get kisiranistic when we are storped by gsu and told no movement for that day we have to go back I have lost two things money and kuuma slice but what happens in a couple of days I’ll live to regrate that day …
what do you mean lad
Ndugu, chanzo cha uhasama wako na punctuation marks ni kipi haswa?
Finish the hekaya ,before upewe kiti.
… Paragraphs would make it easier to read…Nice story
Moral of the story; stay in school, learn punctuation.
some one translate please
New record: The longest sentence in KTalk history
You know the drill kalia hapo[ATTACH=full]89190[/ATTACH]
Nimepata kizunguzungu.
Barely readable
there’s a diamond in all the mud, NV can you take some time and wash off some of the mud by - cutting your compound sentences into smaller ones, extensively utilizing punctuation and checking your spelling…that way, reading your hekaya will be less grating…
Well done NV, leta pt2
come Monday I was not a happy man since the weekend had messed up with me.having spend almost 60 hours inside a bunker following hekaya that alshabab have been spotted around and they had promised to poison the local borehole,everyone was pissed as we had stocked up bottled water.
And from the local agency canteen it was easier to win spesa jackpot than someone give you his water.on sato evening my fellow field man Mr eric traded his “side dish” for a little of glacier bottled water for the fellows who ate familiar with Dadaab,temperatures rise up to 42°C and quenching thirst can be tricky.I had only 1k and I had to buy kamene from Lwf a drink since the only option at our compound was Caro but sexual relationships are forbidden for us working in the same agency.with all maheni in Greek that alpha Lima(alshabab )will launch morters to the compound only made my problems thicker since it went I had to stock my cell with kanywaji for Caro .Am not a pertaker of this drink so when I took a couple on credit everyone was looking at me with a thousand questions but to hell.
Caro wasn’t cute but pasipobudi hubidi I was never,can never and will never be seen with her in public but I was keeping her for the mutual understanding that tuko na kiu and my father in law worked around. sema being ya maji kupanda ghafla from 100/- to 250 wa my 1000/- could only buy 4litres and I take 5 in a day so I had to kunywa soda since when I went to buy and tried to bargain for water a mlevi shouted “sasa wewe ffobe hunywi Malaya haulei Pesa unabania kwani unataka kununua ndege " I left embarrassed.enter Caro and she sips a fee beers and she tells me” leo nanyesha "shit @#@@@# yaani mpaka nimekopa phobe na unasema hivyo?in shot sikuonja slice that day.
Monday ndio hio nimejipanga naenda field kawaida Mimi ndio team leader wa squad I yetu Niko na hasira naenda ni dispatch materials kisha nikakung’ute kitu kidogo kidogo naambiwa nisiende field kuna issue office I should call off the team kidogo kidogo naona UNDSS(in police) Kama 30 kwa compound kidogo kidogo nimeitwa na radio call na head of mission.he is an Israeli a former mossad and although he is very serious I know a few dark secrets which he will hunt me down if I revelled. am summoned to a board room with seriousness that niliionaga when my supervisor alikula mabati 2000.
" yaani wewe umescrew wakenya mpaka umeanza kukula refugees?"project coordinator akapayuka it almost became physical was it not for the hom who restrained me anyway with those allegations nilijua msikii umeingia mbwa I said table the evidence you have the produced texts send by me to the lady and used my phone but lucky me.line ilikua ya bundles mwitu so not in my official names and I could change my phones imei at will so nothing pointed to me
by the end of time I was pronounced innocent and everyone was apologizing but damage had been done the lady had to be resettled since she had rattled a Kenyan and she was at threat luckily I vowed to revenge when i learned that the US is accepting her I either eat her or I write to the embassy
:D:D:D:Dyeah, never discourage a child…
Next time andika na lugha ya mama shenzi
Part one sijasoma.
Please continue, looks like theres a pt3
nikiandika utasoma?
Andika tu,wachana na hawa washenzi,they’re good for nothing idiots