Wanaume baanaaa!

So my barber n I r catching pints at our local yesternight n he gives me a sob story with the headline ‘Marrying an illiterate woman ni kujichoma ukiona’.
Clearly he was stressed.

Hekaya; he cohabited with a single mum who was employed kwa hoteli fulani. Akamfanyia ‘panel beating’ hadi akakuwa mtu (his words,not mine).
Akasomesha the lady’s kid n later she bore him a son.
All along (as he claims), he used to give her money to buy households eg TV,DVD,carpet n the likes. Now, the Lady bought em, but with all receipts in her name. Same as with rent money he gave her, the receipts read her name.

So wen the relationship went south, mrembo akaEvict jamaa.
Zile za “Get out of my house!”
Then after slaps here n there, the lady akakimbia cop station to report.
Mediation efforts of course showed what you are thinking, the lady owns everything n pays rent.

Hapa ikifika sasa mtu hufanyaje?

Hapo sasa mtu huachika. Ukiachwa achika…Karma atakusaidia

as my grandmother used to say … kenya ti ruhi. … let the guy enjoy his new freedom. the fields are rich and ready to be exploited.

As village elders we say chukua slice zako uende…

Kunguru Hafugiki. Mtaambiwa mara ngapi?

Mimi nilisema kuma a whole mtoto amepitia na si wangu is a NO Go zone. Ni what part huwa wasee hawaget? A ferking motherfucker amepitia hiyo kuma unataka kuingia. Give it 10 years na atakuwa anaanza kupimana kifua na wewe.

Carpet na electronics tu?
I thought ilikuwa kitu serious kama sheppart na nduthi (always make sure these are in your name).

He claims carpet, electronics n ALL house hold goods

True, in the Somali culture in case of divorce the man is expected to move out of the house with only his clothes. Furniture na hizo vitu zote are considered a woman’s rightful wedding gift.

Mara ngapi tutasema hapa that: Mwanaume lipia/Nunua Nyumba, Nunua funiture yote ya nyumba, all electrical appliances, lipa school fees. The only things the lady of the house should buy ni utensils, cuttlery and curtains. Madem hukatch feelings sana, mkikosana atabeba vitu zake akienda or akufukuze from kwake kama yeye ndiye hulipa rent lakini if she owns utensils tu atazibeba akienda nazo wapi? Mwanaume ukikaa kwa nyumba ya dem unaweza geuzwa mboch

House hold goods nisawa tu akae nazo. Ingekuwa shamba ama company anakuevict hapo nakuwa silent killer. Kill her and make a lamp shade out of her hide.

Mekanika ua priorities are somehow funny. Mimi namwachia sheppart na ailishe na best foods in the market

Wewe ni mtu wa aina gani? Sheppart ni kama mtoi wako. Utaachia aje kunguru ailishe?

Indeed, my priorities are skewed.
You’re insane if you think I’ll hand over my dogs.

Hehe… mbona analipiwa rent na dame? Ama anadanganya? Dame amfukuze nani alipe rent? Sponja?
Another thing is that dealing with an illiterate or non-schooled woman is dealing with the female basic instinct. And you dont want to deal with that.

huyo kinyozi wako ni ovyo sana,atatoboa mwenye amesoma kweli

Kama walizaa mtoto na kunguru, wacha baby boy aenjoi mkeka na runinga…

https://media0.giphy.com/media/S7jKEqmTbee7S/giphy.gif

hapo ni kudispatch mtu hadi kwa ancestors wake,shepart ,NO!

ama kweli wahenga hawakukosea waliposema, “[SIZE=4]kinyozi hajinyoi ananyolewa na khupipi[/SIZE]”