(cont.) … I thought to myself and saw a chance to get something out of this uncle knowing very well he was one of the stingy ‘mirrionaires’ in the village. I ask for ‘ya macho’ which he gladly obliged. He asks me to convince the girl to come over to where he was seated away from the light glare. At this point as I head to where Nyakio was chilling, am torn between satisfying my lust or being a good boy who respects his elders.
Mimi huyo kuendea dem napata wako ma manzi kadhaa, nikamtap Nyakio kwa mgongo na kasalamu kakafuata. Trust me she was overjoyed to see me from the smile alinikumba nayo. So here I am with this beauty queen not sure what to tell her. Sijui nimsho vyenye uncle ya me anadai while inside my heart namimi pia ndo huyo naumia. I do some quick calculations and decide wacha uncle ajipange. So nikaanza kutupa lugha na tu uongo kiasi naona dem ameanza kubambika zile za ghai! aki wewe. Kucheki direction ya uncle naona ametulia na kasmile akijua tu leo lazima alalishe nyundo kwa kabati not knowing that I had far much better plans than him. I kept glancing his way once in a while and I could clearly see he was growing impatient. Nikaambia shoree atulie kiasi tu nakam. I get to where he is seated and grab the seat next to him. Nikamseti I am almost done convincing the girl and soon she will be joining him, to which uncle akabambika akatoa wallet na kunipatia thao ingine for a job supposedly well done. Ole wake angelijua tu. I excuse myself and go back to the girls and soon forgot about the waiting uncle.
Dem kuingiana box mimi huyo tukachomoka, kumbe uncle alicheki tukitoka akashuku so akatufuata. I followed my insticts and opted not to take her home but to a friend’s cave as the said ninja lived only a short distance from the club. Uncle Thio na ufala yake alienda mpaka home thinking nilikuwa nimepeleka dem huko only to find an empty room with no signs of Nyakio or Kanono. Sikuwa na time ya upuus ya ma luvy duvy mob and after some clumsy attempt nikafanya kile kilituleta na hio chapter tukafunga. Nilijua siku perform mbaya sana from the giggles zile nilikuwa napewa on our way to their home.
Inakaa uncle Thio alidunga hema kwa boma hoping to intercept my mission and after a long wait akaamua kurudi club. As am being kissed goodnight at the gate nikaona Thiong’o anapita and was sure he witnessed the hugs being dished out. I pretend not to see him and after all that I head back to the club ready na kiswahili ya kumkanganya nayo. After a couple of minutes while looking for my cousins I spot him at a different table drinking alone while holding his head ofcourse not a happy man. I approach him pretending not to know whats going on, and he is like don’t you dare come near me. He heads home leaving us at the club and so me and the crew continued drinking.
Kumbe amefika home and alerted wazazi ati ametuona kwa club kama tumelewa na tunakumbana na malanye wa sokoni. Kufika kwa boma na ulevi zetu tunapata mzee ametungojea na mkongojo. Hakuna maswali ama ma Happy new year, ni bakora tulishikishwa na mwaka mpya. Sikulala home hio night and the following morning nikarudi nyairofi bila kwaheri. I later met miss kijiji in town and after sometime I landed a rematch, this time bila haraka wala wasiwasi. As for the results, beautiful Nyakio would be better placed to comment. We later made up na uncle Thio but najua hajawai sahau.