Woiye nikopeshe 500

Sex & Relationships
1

It has become a culture within some girls, to send a text of “nikopeshe pesa”. Some of them you just meet them a few days ago na wanataka kukopa besha.

Girl: Woiye nikopeshe 500
Me: Ok nitakukoshepa
Girl: thanks sana, utaniokolea sana, Mwaaaaaah
(She is so happy).
Me: But i charge 10% interest on money i lend. So you will return Ksh 550
Girl: Ghaiii, Sawa nitalipa na interest.
Me: I forgot to tell you that i also need collateral.
(Using collateral word to confuse her a bit)
Girl: Ati nini unataka?
Me: I need something to guarantee me that you will pay me money.
Girl: nini unataka?
Me: Something worth about 500, usipolipa niuze to get my money back.
Girl: Ngaaaaii yani hutanikopesha.
Me: Those are simple terms.
Girl: Ok

My problem is solved.

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2

wacha watu wa “A real man blah blah blah blah wakuone”

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3

I face the same predicament, only on a different level… :D:D:D

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4

si uombe tu coomer in return…

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5

I once asked money from a woman who was trying to request a soft loan from me;

Dame: Niaje Bingi, how are you?
Mimi: Niko poa mimi sijui wewe
Dame: Ni save na 1k nakurudishia Friday (was on Saturday then)
Mimi: Babe una 500 nikwamue pesa zangu on Monday mwanzo ndo nikupe hiyo 1k?
Dame: Sawa nitakupa, but promise utanikopesha 2k basi
Mimi: Sawa

She gave me the 500 ambazo nilimzungusha nazo for a whole week. In the end I gave her back her 500 na kumwambia “sori sana babe, ile stori ilishindikana…shika hizi 500 zako coz nikikaa nazo nitakula zote!” The lady was “aki Bingi umeniwaste, sitawai kuomba pesa tena!”

And this is the trick that I have been using on anyone (sana sana madame) trying to get soft loans from me

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6

:D:D senge wewe

7

kuna dem mkamba who had been giving me puthy freely when she was in colle…i could hit it anytime of the day, and it was damn tight and sweet.

Sasa, kila mwezi ananiomba pesa anasema ni pension ya puthy yake…nacheka tu…kisha namwambia nitaanza kulipia pension akifikisha menopause.

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8

Huyo dem ni wife yako?

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9

NO WOMAN NO CRY,

10

Mkubwa wa CBK, Njoroge, anajua unafanya hivi?:D:D:D:D

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11

A real man provides

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12

Yeah, like Cyrus Jirongo. Threshold from Wednesday night to Friday evening ali-provide.

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13

Mia tano ni petty cash kwangu,I can even use it to wipe my ass

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14

[ATTACH=full]90079[/ATTACH]

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15

NV nani amekuuliza? If we need your opinion, we will beat it out of you. Chukua hiyo kwanza…meffihttps://media.giphy.com/media/PQYIR39ju62sw/giphy.gif

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16

Huyo naweza mpa…at least a chick who bailed you out during dry spells deserve some "pension"takataka ni ile inataka kukumanga tu.

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17

Hii tabia ya omba omba huwa ya a chick ulimeet then ukachukua number but haukulike vile.So huwa hana kitu ya maana ya kukuambia, ni mashida zake tu
Mimi huambia mtu atume nyonyo ama puthy ndio nitume iyo doh…

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18

[ATTACH=full]90089[/ATTACH]
Grow a pair first before uongee upuss hapa
Chieth Oliktiga

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19

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

20

:D:D:D:D:D
It’s just business