Worst Place to Live? I Swear I Can't Stay Here...............

So today I decided to take a slow, leisurely drive to Ole Polos. Needed to do some thinking.

The moment I hit the Rongai-Kiserian stretch I knew I had made a bad mistake. I will not even mention the unending, unsightly slum that seems to go on and on and on and on - I mean, what’s wrong with baboon-IQed Africans? Can’t you just plan an urban area?

What’s this crap of an endless collection of shanties along a thin, two-lane road? Going on and on and on for miles?

And then there is the stupid human and vehicular traffic cutting in and out of you like mad bats from hell? Like seriously, why do people, donkeys and ugly matatus have to disobey every traffic rule in the book? Did I mention donkeys? DONKEYS!

And that’s before I got past Kiserian, and the road narrowed to three metres. THREE. And sand trucks from I don’t know where began to crowd me out, making me almost shred my tyres on the roads edge. Baboon-IQed Africans should all be sterilised, I tell you.

But that was not all.

Just when I got to the scenic parts before Ole Polos, I encountered the Probox menace. Apparently, all the matatus from Kiserian to beyond are proboxes driven by crazed mathafakas who think playing chicken is fun. So there I am, a sand lorry on my tail and a probox coming at me like a bat from hell, on a four-metre wide highway. It ain’t fun.

So, sweaty and a little tense, I was happy to drive into the Jordan Breeze Motel. It was 5pm, and I thought I could even spend the night there (alone!) and let the madmen on the road go to sleep.

Mathafakas told me a room in the middle of nowhere, with no chick, was going for 4.5K. Ferk them.

The whole ordeal had a bright spot. A few kilometres down the road I came to a small rural town called Keisamis or something like that. I got into the best pub, and made friends.

Out of the corner of my eye, as I spoke to John the butcher who doubles as the local medicineman and his bratha Emmanuel, I saw five of the most beautiful dirty titties I have seen in a long time. Given the respect the two morans were showing me I didn’t dare speak of what I saw. Sometimes you do not show your claws too early.

As I swigged some WhiteCUP, one thing became clear; I will battle the proboxes and sand trucks again, and pay the Sh250 John told me they charge for a room.

Hopefully, I will pass the Rongai-Kiserian death trap - the worst place to live in my opinion - unscathed, because there will be much to do, babies to make, titties to suck, empty promises to make.

The good book commands it; go ye forth and multiply, fill the world.

There’s a lot of empty land I saw.

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Have you ever been to hell,please paint for us a picture coz some of us will be permanent visitors when we meet our demise.

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You talk of sterilisation. Just when Raila revists the claim that the 2014-2015 polio vaccine campaign was actually a sterilisation campaign by the govetnment… Talk of conditioning…

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Mzee hii umri si ya kusumbuana na Suzuki Maruti. Enda auimbie vitukuu

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Guka do you spit on young men to bless them? But wewe na hio mate yako ya White cap unaeza patia mtoto wa wenyewe infection moja ajab :smiley:

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me thinks u saw a bitch literally!:D:D:D

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hehe mzee your grandkids need sterilization

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Seriously, I saw the two morans greeting school boys by placing their hands on their heads. IT WAS SOO COOL!

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Coomernina!:D:D:D:D:D:D

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four dhousends five hadred for a room with NO CHICKS??!?!??!!

http://i0.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/facebook/000/008/632/aw-hell-naw.jpg

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Wacha maringo. Do you think that those who live there do so out of choice?

He’s talking about urban planning. Low cost housing could be planned as well as upmarket areas.

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:D:D:D:D:p

If you aspire to a better situation that’s falls out of personal responsibility and more towards collective societal responsibility waKenya husema;
“you’re being unrealistic”
and,
“why are you always so negative”
or,
“why don’t you move out if you don’t like the way things are done here”
or,
"kwani unafikiri unaweza fanya vizuri zaidi ?

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Ksh 250 for a room in Ktalk means for a shot. Anyway attach some pics sometimes.

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Fiud mecho= KTalk official Ranter.

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Ever thought of writing books ?

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Someone would think some people here were born with royal lineage, na walizaliwa ndumberi na wakakuja Nairofi na basi imebeba magunia na mandizi.

But its none of my business.

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Early man, you always complain how Africans breed like rats and here you are quoting the good book saying breed like rats…I see empty land too.

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Ahahahahaha spot on guka! Lakini ungeleta picha

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