I have not listened to the tape so do bear with me. I do agree that you do not have to live together day in day out for a relationship to thrive.
However, if it is within the context of a marriage with kids born it is best to try and make it work under one roof for the sake of those kids you both created mwinjoyo time but if this turns out to be a gas chamber, then best to co-parent. Besides it makes sense economically if you share bills under one roof and you cannot deny this is a winner.
No 2, even in a marriage everyone needs their own space else you will suffocate each other to death, can tell you this for free. V important that each one pursues their own interests then you come together at some point. Mimi nione my sports na yeye aone scientific documentaries na atusomee big fat journals sisi wenye tumeshindwa.
Years ago a boss of mine lived in North Lando and the girlfriend lived in Cambridge. They used to see each other every weekend. A w/e at his when he had the kids who loved dearly and a w/e at hers when the kids were at the mum's. Ask me about a happy couple and I will show you that one. The kids grew up happily and flew the nest.
The son walked the dad down the aisle when he married this long term girlfriend. Who surprise surprise was their godmother as she was their mum's best friend. Yezza, those best friends who pinch your man. Being a Kenyan mshamba I could not get my head around this whole set up. I would ask him again and again how their relationship kicked off and I would sit there goggle eyed in total disbelief marvelling at how he makes it work with such finesse.
Years down the rd, I have since met v many couples like that who co-parent easily. If marriage is not for you don't let that get in the way of siring/raising kids. But be ready for the challenges.
Don't buy western ideologies wholesale unless you have the mental capacity to handle it. They can, as they have seen it work around them over the years.