A Brush With Death

[Riddim]

@Rene Descartes

Pink handles kujeni. he has an armoured landrover, a glock pistol that fires 19mm X 100 catridge, and a house in karen.
purr_40 couldn’t resist.

@Female Perspective …unaitwo

@Fala 12

ngoja ktalk csi wararue hii inteligense report yako lakini kabla wafike… mbisha naniiii

@BigMark

9:45hrs New years eve Saturday 31st December 2016 driving in my Defender 110 from my work place in Westlands to my house in Karen, just after the Kabuagi turn off at the junction of Ngong road and Karen road, the car right in front of me (a black Toyota Caldina registration KBD) suddenly brakes for no apparent reason as the road ahead is clear, I also brake to avoid hitting it, merely missing its rear bumper by a whisker as I’m trying to see what was going on, the car behind me also a Toyota caldina registration KAZ white In colour overtakes and stops right next to the drivers door, the car has two occupants, the passenger a huge Indian man points a gun to my head and fires two loud shots BANG BANG!!!, I duck under the steering wheel, shortly I hear screeching tyres as the two vehicles make a hasty retreat
20:00hrs Still under the steering wheel I feel for any signs of blood on my head then I reach for my Glock 19 in the glove compartment…
20:15hrs I drive to the Karen police station.

@introvert , tunahitaji sketch ya hii maneno tuelewe visuuuuri:)…fanya kama ile ya “insulated the mabati walls”

[upepo]

@Purr_27

Early 30’s

Shida ya @Ice_Cube ilikuwa nini ili wengine turekebishe kabla ya ku-apply.

[system]

@Riddim

@Female Perspective …unaitwo

@introvert , tunahitaji sketch ya hii maneno tuelewe visuuuuri:)…fanya kama ile ya “insulated the mabati walls”

Ngoja nipark hii Labogin halafu nikuje.

[spear]

“I told you so” I couldn’t resist. Wachana na bibi ya watu while there are many ladies around.

That said, I’m glad you are still here with us.

Lastly register that car as armoured with NPS before they start looking for you and claiming you are part of international crime syndicate.

[Fala_12]

@upepo

Shida ya @Ice_Cube ilikuwa nini ili wengine turekebishe kabla ya ku-apply.

wacha nikuibie siri lakini in silence cubes asione anaeza nitumia jeshi…
sasa sometime last year cubes alisema yeye ni mutu wa 4pumps a shot 3 shots a week. nayeye purity ako ile age blanket yenye wanawake hawavai ngodha juu ya nyengese (36-40something…bjurman alieleza in detail jana) so purity kuwa anaona ni kama anaonjeswa tuu akaenda maombi kwa padre liberty. liberty kumuombea maombi ikajibiwa na marine one kilo. siida ni kuwa kufika kwa kina kilo purity aliambiwa awache kuface mt kenya aanze kuface lake fulani huwa na hyacinth… sa purity akaona hatoboi akarudi ndeiya pale kwa busheri… sa hapo naye waka akakuwa anamuwacha kwa kitanda saa tisa asubuhi anaenda kukamua njaū… sa kikakuwa kimeumana kabisa purity akarudi kwa fr.liberty … fr. maombi ya pili akaona dawa ni kitu permanent, wakaendea ile vibrator ya mjengo ya Randy… so by COB jana vibrator imepatikana lakini inahitaji continous power suppy. as we speak wako kwa mzito introfart wakimsikizia atoe ile betri iko kwa pacemaker ya guka awawekee kwa vibrator. shida sasa ni guka ako karibu kuwa Rip lakini hio ndio ilikuwa prophecy ya uwes kwa ile ndoto ya jana

[blueline]

:D:D:D:D now i should sell my jalopy and consider importing an armoured 110 even though i dont pursue vaginas that have ‘owners’.

[system]

@Fala 12

wacha nikuibie siri lakini in silence cubes asione anaeza nitumia jeshi…
sasa sometime last year cubes alisema yeye ni mutu wa 4pumps a shot 3 shots a week. nayeye purity ako ile age blanket yenye wanawake hawavai ngodha juu ya nyengese (36-40something…bjurman alieleza in detail jana) so purity kuwa anaona ni kama anaonjeswa tuu akaenda maombi kwa padre liberty. liberty kumuombea maombi ikajibiwa na marine one kilo. siida ni kuwa kufika kwa kina kilo purity aliambiwa awache kuface mt kenya aanze kuface lake fulani huwa na hyacinth… sa purity akaona hatoboi akarudi ndeiya pale kwa busheri… sa hapo naye waka akakuwa anamuwacha kwa kitanda saa tisa asubuhi anaenda kukamua njaū… sa kikakuwa kimeumana kabisa purity akarudi kwa fr.liberty … fr. maombi ya pili akaona dawa ni kitu permanent, wakaendea ile vibrator ya mjengo ya Randy… so by COB jana vibrator imepatikana lakini inahitaji continous power suppy. as we speak wako kwa mzito introfart wakimsikizia atoe ile betri iko kwa pacemaker ya guka awawekee kwa vibrator. shida sasa ni guka ako karibu kuwa Rip lakini hio ndio ilikuwa prophecy ya uwes kwa ile ndoto ya jana

:D:D:D
DO1 Senji.

[spear]

@Fala 12

wacha nikuibie siri lakini in silence cubes asione anaeza nitumia jeshi…
sasa sometime last year cubes alisema yeye ni mutu wa 4pumps a shot 3 shots a week. nayeye purity ako ile age blanket yenye wanawake hawavai ngodha juu ya nyengese (36-40something…bjurman alieleza in detail jana) so purity kuwa anaona ni kama anaonjeswa tuu akaenda maombi kwa padre liberty. liberty kumuombea maombi ikajibiwa na marine one kilo. siida ni kuwa kufika kwa kina kilo purity aliambiwa awache kuface mt kenya aanze kuface lake fulani huwa na hyacinth… sa purity akaona hatoboi akarudi ndeiya pale kwa busheri… sa hapo naye waka akakuwa anamuwacha kwa kitanda saa tisa asubuhi anaenda kukamua njaū… sa kikakuwa kimeumana kabisa purity akarudi kwa fr.liberty … fr. maombi ya pili akaona dawa ni kitu permanent, wakaendea ile vibrator ya mjengo ya Randy… so by COB jana vibrator imepatikana lakini inahitaji continous power suppy. as we speak wako kwa mzito introfart wakimsikizia atoe ile betri iko kwa pacemaker ya guka awawekee kwa vibrator. shida sasa ni guka ako karibu kuwa Rip lakini hio ndio ilikuwa prophecy ya uwes kwa ile ndoto ya jana

Whatever you are using in this hot Njaanuary, ni Kali.

[Fala_12]

@introvert

:D:D:D
DO1 Senji.

najua umekubali kuua guka lakini ni sawa tu … bwawe fwakin sieeet

[Ice_Cube]

@Fala 12

wacha nikuibie siri lakini in silence cubes asione anaeza nitumia jeshi…
sasa sometime last year cubes alisema yeye ni mutu wa 4pumps a shot 3 shots a week. nayeye purity ako ile age blanket yenye wanawake hawavai ngodha juu ya nyengese (36-40something…bjurman alieleza in detail jana) so purity kuwa anaona ni kama anaonjeswa tuu akaenda maombi kwa padre liberty. liberty kumuombea maombi ikajibiwa na marine one kilo. siida ni kuwa kufika kwa kina kilo purity aliambiwa awache kuface mt kenya aanze kuface lake fulani huwa na hyacinth… sa purity akaona hatoboi akarudi ndeiya pale kwa busheri… sa hapo naye waka akakuwa anamuwacha kwa kitanda saa tisa asubuhi anaenda kukamua njaū… sa kikakuwa kimeumana kabisa purity akarudi kwa fr.liberty … fr. maombi ya pili akaona dawa ni kitu permanent, wakaendea ile vibrator ya mjengo ya Randy… so by COB jana vibrator imepatikana lakini inahitaji continous power suppy. as we speak wako kwa mzito introfart wakimsikizia atoe ile betri iko kwa pacemaker ya guka awawekee kwa vibrator. shida sasa ni guka ako karibu kuwa Rip lakini hio ndio ilikuwa prophecy ya uwes kwa ile ndoto ya jana

:D:D nashuku uliibiwa hii story na mtu, lakini kwa waka complications zilikua ametandikia ng’ombe mattress kwa bedroom halafu usiku anajifanya anaenda choo mara kama 50 lakini wakiwasha taa ako tu hapo chini kwa mattress. Sijui alikua anafanya nini. True Story.
Hatusemi he is an animal lover, lakini anatoka Kiambu

[Jefe]

@BigMark

I had no idea in 2014 when I purchased the used vehicle in the uk I was buying an armoured vehicle and that one day it would save my life

hii ni moja ya zile MRP Uhuru alipea polisi? o_O

[Riddim]

@Fala 12

wacha nikuibie siri lakini in silence cubes asione anaeza nitumia jeshi…
sasa sometime last year cubes alisema yeye ni mutu wa 4pumps a shot 3 shots a week. nayeye purity ako ile age blanket yenye wanawake hawavai ngodha juu ya nyengese (36-40something…bjurman alieleza in detail jana) so purity kuwa anaona ni kama anaonjeswa tuu akaenda maombi kwa padre liberty. liberty kumuombea maombi ikajibiwa na marine one kilo. siida ni kuwa kufika kwa kina kilo purity aliambiwa awache kuface mt kenya aanze kuface lake fulani huwa na hyacinth… sa purity akaona hatoboi akarudi ndeiya pale kwa busheri… sa hapo naye waka akakuwa anamuwacha kwa kitanda saa tisa asubuhi anaenda kukamua njaū… sa kikakuwa kimeumana kabisa purity akarudi kwa fr.liberty … fr. maombi ya pili akaona dawa ni kitu permanent, wakaendea ile vibrator ya mjengo ya Randy… so by COB jana vibrator imepatikana lakini inahitaji continous power suppy. as we speak wako kwa mzito introfart wakimsikizia atoe ile betri iko kwa pacemaker ya guka awawekee kwa vibrator. shida sasa ni guka ako karibu kuwa Rip lakini hio ndio ilikuwa prophecy ya uwes kwa ile ndoto ya jana

Avai Njagí kwí mundu arakwenderia fangi njaanuary:D:D:D

[Fala_12]

@Ice_Cube

:D:D nashuku uliibiwa hii story na mtu, lakini kwa waka complications zilikua ametandikia ng’ombe mattress kwa bedroom halafu usiku anajifanya anaenda choo mara kama 50 lakini wakiwasha taa ako tu hapo chini kwa mattress. Sijui alikua anafanya nini. True Story.
Hatusemi he is an animal lover, lakini anatoka Kiambu

naskia kwa waka kulikuwa pia na mbusi kondoo kuku na funda…
lakini cid hii maneno yote ni wewe kukosa kufikisha threshold imesababisha

[Fala_12]

@spear

Whatever you are using in this hot Njaanuary, ni Kali.

fangi na Njaa bana

[Ice_Cube]

@Fala 12

naskia kwa waka kulikuwa pia na mbusi kondoo kuku na funda…
lakini cid hii maneno yote ni wewe kukosa kufikisha threshold imesababisha

nimewacha pombe sasa, hadi nilikua natafuta mtu amesha zaa nisifanye kazi mingi.lakini sasa threshold itapanda

[Ole_masai]

Wapi naweza pata armoured used car?

[Fala_12]

@Ice_Cube

nimewacha pombe sasa, hadi nilikua natafuta mtu amesha zaa nisifanye kazi mingi.lakini sasa threshold itapanda

yaani advice ya expert m2random haijaingia kwa kichwa bado? mambo ya threshold itabidi tutume mfupaspective aconfirm

[system]

U were doing well until u mentioned single mothers.

 Most importantly the event has opened my eyes and I have decided to change my ways, no longer will I chase after married pusssy, am a changed man, a man hell-bent on doing only good, in fact am contemplating on starting a charity organisation in my name aimed at helping destitute kids and single mothers

[mtadao]

@Fala 12

ngoja ktalk csi wararue hii inteligense report yako lakini kabla wafike… mbisha naniiii

Eeeh mbica of you cocking the glock James Bond style

[Viking]

You were lucky, tungeona kwa 9pm news ‘Love triangle turns sour’