This is embarrasing lakini sawa tu. Kuna time nimelewa on a friday nikatoka pub kama saa 7 usiku. Ulevi yangu na miraa kidogo nilikuwa nimeonjeshwa by a pal ikaniambia nipark gari kidogo niingie xvideos ndio niende home kama nimecharge , kufika nikurukia wife tu.
Next thing i know, naona jamaa anatap kioo ya mlango na bunduki, kumbe ni wezi!!!
Simu ilienda tu hivyo na 3k ilikuwa kwa wallet. Kwanza kama wananichekelea. One dude was even asking kama wanirudishie simu nimalize video kwanza.
When we were kids, me and my buddies used to press door bells in the neighbourhood then hide. I was about 6 years old. In the process we spolit one of the bells, leaving hanging wires. Then we’d make the wires touch each other for the bell to ring. One day when it was my turn to ring the bell I learnt my first practical electricity safety lesson. I touched the wires with bare hands and I got stuck to the bell as the current flowed through me. I nearly died. I do not know how long I was stuck there but It seemed like a year.
Nikipa raima class 5 my cousin and I tulikua tunapenda ku-explore abandoned buildings or those under construction. Sasa ikafika time fea (catapult) ndio zilikuwa the in thing. We used to kill weaver birds alafu tunapika na kula baadaye mtaani. Sikh moja we’re on the second floor of this gorofa under construction and we happen to see some useless teacher from a distance. He was one of those stupid mofos who’d look for the slightest excuse to hand out beatings. Tukasema huyu hatuezi mwacha.
Niliachilia jiwe moja na hasira kwanza nikikumbuka kichapo alikuwa ametupa like 2 days before, ikampata squarely kwa kichwa. The guy staggered a bit then sat down I think to get his bearings. After about a minute he’d figured out it must be one of the pupils he taught that launched the missile. He then started issuing threats, shouting at the top of his voice “nimewaona, kesho mtanitambua!!”. Kusaka hivyo Cuzo pia akapandwa na hasira, akachukua fea na kuwachilia. Hiyo ikampata kwa shoulder. The bitch had to run away coz he didn’t know exactly where the missiles were coming from, how many of us there were or what else we were planning. The place was a little deserted.
Kesho yake kwa assembly vitisho kwa wingi, psychological warfare. Ati “those who threw stones at me yesterday, I have already caught one of you and he’s given me all your names. Come forward before I come for you.” But hatukua na wasiwasi juu tulijua ni Mimi tu na right hand man Cuzo tuli-undertake hiyo mission na hakuna MTU mwingine tuliambia. That made me feel very powerful.
Miaka zangu za primo I used to keep dush fuga kwa brott but kuna jamaa kwa neighborhood alikua na dush mingi so we used plan raids kwake.
Sku mmoja Kama kawa mimi Kama Mafioso niliamua kuingia headfirst kwa keja ya Dush ndio nichague ma white pure, they were like the ultimate breed back then, uski nilikuama after kuona siezi jitoa ilibidii Ni shout for help
…iyo ingine wacha tu
Was planning to make Gathoni pregnant because of her wide hips and light skin which she was willing by the way,yet I had a baby coming from wife Chero. 4 years down the road I ask myself “what was I thinking ?”
Long time ago before @Mosa azaliwe our neighbour had lots of chickens tulikua tunachinja every other friday night anapeleka kwa order zake za hoteli, hotels dont take heads, filigisi (kaiga @Gio ) and miguu, vichwa zilikua zachukuliwa na mundu mulosi na kaigagio ilikua tunaachia mwenyewe na miguu tunatupa,
one friday night tukichinja kaambiwa eti sokoni Majengo miguu ya kuku hua yauzwa mimi nikaona pesa na macho. kapark miguu yote kwa gunia and by 6:30am was at the market. kachukua space yangu katandika gunia kapanga miguu inne inne kaanza kushout dosco dosco (dosco was msa lingua for kobole)
after two hrs sikua nimeuza kitu kaongezea miguu ikakua sita sita, still no buyers, he he.
kufika saa tano kapanga miguu kumi kumi na bei ikashuka to two bob, sikuuza ata moja, kufika saa sita nilijitoa polepole kaa mtu anaenda kukojoa nikaishia home. kufika watu walikua wanaokotwa chini ya meza.
kununua balloon tickets kaa zote kwa shop ili nipate ile balloon kubwa. didn’t know it’s ticket never existed! I had to pay the lady 8 Bob aniuzie Io kubwa…zile siku 8 ilikuwa 8 bob
Tulitega monkey na tukashika mmoja, kuna vile walikuwa wamezoea kutuharibia maembe kwa mti. Huku coast maembe huiva kwa mti, wengine hungoja yaanguke so tumbili hutoka msituni kuja kuharvest.
Tulikuwa wengi so tukamfunga vizuri na kila mtu akachukua wembe tukaanza kumnyoa bald alafu tukamwachilia tu aende. Wenzake walipomwona after the ordeal all ran away shrieking. Hawakuji hapo tena since then.
Next thing niliskia eti tunatafutwa na watu wa Colobus Trust.
Sisi tulikua tunaenda kwa zile phone ulikua unaeka coins sijui booth ndo jina yazo…tunachukua wire and kuchokora that ka mtaro ya coins… alafu we used to call 999 tunawashow watombe chini. Ndo hapo @Meria Mata was born tukaacha izo riba
