KUNASWA

[captain_obvious]

Hawa female clients, wengine huwa na upuzi sana. Kwanza mtu akianza kuniuliza maswali mengi hayana mwelekeo mi hukunja sura ndio aone sina time ya upuss. Ata kubuy kitu alafu aseme nimpelekee kwake, namwambia niko busy saidii sigwes funga shop. Sitaki kuma ya msaada pris.

[MegaKing]

@von githus

baby daddy they talk for 45 mins me nikingoja hapo kama ng’ombe

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

[1776]

@Mwikalilet

ungepiga hiyo coomer jeki proper. do you know ladies ndio wanamalizwa na dry spell? wanaume wakitaka kumaliza dry spell huwa wanaenda to the local sj and koinange while ladies give out to the nearest d*ck holders like caretaker, watchie like uwesmakei. the rest suffer without any solution

:D:D:D:D:D:D:Dreally??? coming from a pinky that’s just weird!

[captain_obvious]

@von githus

kuna some bishes ata wakikupea na socks you just walk away. in my campus days I scored this Chic from Egerton kufika Kwa man cave atapata call from his baby daddy they talk for 45 mins me nikingoja hapo kama ng’ombe, after that another nigga calls ati ulisema utakam Leo. …sahio hio nikajua nikipepeta hii ntaimbiwa luwere in a months time. I had to text a friend anicall that I have a presentation in ten minutes.

He he, you still needed an excuse after madharau ya 45 minutes? Mimi around 2015 kuna ka 18 year old tulikuwa tunachapiana tu general stories kakiwa high school. She was hot na figure pia moto, used to tell me she wants to be a model, naasume tu ni ufala. A few months after kcse, she appeared at my place (walikua wamehama hio mtaa) saying ati sijui amekam kupick leaving cert. Kidogo “oh captain obvious you know I always wanted you, ni vile I was still in school”. Papo hapo I was like say no more, 3 minutes later nilikua ndaaani. This happened 2 more times, bila cd, she only used to ask for “pesa ya P2”. Saaasa, one day she came, all dolled up, akasema phone yake ina shida atumie yangu kucall msee flani huwa “promoter wa modelling”. She called for kitu 5 minutes then left in a hurry to meet this promoter. Mimi kuangalia phone, kumbe she made 3 calls, to 3 different guys. For 2 calls, Truecaller ikaniandikia some Gaza-ish names, eti sijui jonte adi palmer na champion bwoy Dante. Alafu TC profile ya huyo promoter ilikua mpaka na picha, jamaa ananikalia ni kama ana KISONONO, if not ukedi. Boss wacha nyee zirudi kwa tumbo!! Alafu one of the Gaza-ish characters sent a text seeking clarity, eti “umesema utakam saa ngapi? Mi ntakua tu kejani.” Hapo nikajua kumbe whenever this little whore comes visiting, she’s always on some mjulubeng sampling tour?? “Promoter” pia obviously atapewa vitu ndio amsaidie na “modelling career” yake. Hio siku stress karibu iniuwe. Kesho yake nikajikaza nikatembelea kituo. 3 months later nikatembea tena. After kuconfirm Niko swafi kama pamba, nikaacha upus ya judging a book by its cover.

[M-Pesa]

@syndicate kama ungekula hyo kitu mkubwa saa hii ungekuwa unaugua pole pole ka panya ya kimilili aka uweskaswende :D:D:D

[system]

:D:D:D
Boiz hazitaki za bure na hazitaki za kulipia.
Tunatakaje jameni?

[1824]

@Mwikalilet

ungepiga hiyo coomer jeki proper. do you know ladies ndio wanamalizwa na dry spell? wanaume wakitaka kumaliza dry spell huwa wanaenda to the local sj and koinange while ladies give out to the nearest d*ck holders like caretaker, watchie like uwesmakei. the rest suffer without any solution

kupiga jeki ndio gani omwami

[reigai]

@M-Pesa

@syndicate kama ungekula hyo kitu mkubwa saa hii ungekuwa unaugua pole pole ka panya ya kimilili aka uweskaswende :D:D:D

Hehhe izo jina za Gaza ni hatari saidi
:D:D:D

[incognitus]

Kuuza Tevee pipu= God’s plan
Dame kutaka mkwangaras=God’s plan
Boychild kuhepa= NOT God’s plan
You just rejected maana from heaven my guy.

[Claire]

@syndicate

jackpin ya aerial ndio imetoka

Oshie, she did this herself -a very smart lady, a true definition of a schemer (saitan). On the flip side, you were so unfairhttps://kenyatalk.s3.amazonaws.com/2018/03/225540_700746eac2ec611991e1d8c2e992b6ca.pnghttps://kenyatalk.s3.amazonaws.com/2018/03/225540_700746eac2ec611991e1d8c2e992b6ca.png. You think hiyo baridi ya friday ilikuwa mchezo. [SIZE=2]Ama[/SIZE][SIZE=1] hiyo nini [/SIZE][SIZE=2]ni barsoap itaishahttps://kenyatalk.s3.amazonaws.com/2018/03/225540_700746eac2ec611991e1d8c2e992b6ca.png?, She hates you na next time kazi hupati[/SIZE]:D:D

@syndicate

Watu wa usungu. dll washeni nduthi

[SIZE=1]…na wale hatuna tukae wapi[/SIZE]:oops:

@pseudonym

Hii, yule jamaa Wa gas hangewacha

I guess am too slow, now I know why somebody hatakangi “strangers” kwa nyumba sana sana “hawa watu wa gas”

[chebukatineza]

U @syndicate are an angel or u have just told us a big lie. Either of the 2. Period.

[suspect]

Got slices from one, nilipomtoa pandy akasema nisimwage ndani, nikavaa cd, afterwards akasema cd inamchoma, nikabadilisha brand, ilibidi amenyamaza

[ceinZ]

@von githus

nikajua nikipepeta hii ntaimbiwa luwere in a months time

:D:D:D:D

[uwesmake]

@syndicate

Mko fiti wadau. Watu wa usungu. dll washeni nduthi. As you all know am the village electronics supplier and furniture maker. So juzi (last Fri), nimepeleka TV kwa client manzi mfiti ma curves na ma haga chonjo huko pipu kwa kina Vuja dek. Ngunaz kumbe ako na sponser ka @gashwin ivi. So mimi nikajipa shughuli did the set up ya tv, kumaliza ngunaz akadai nibaki kiasi anipikie chai. No sawa nikachill. Chai kuiva akaleta nikaichapa flush. Ngunaz alibambika sana na my professional services akanishow ataniletea customers wengi kama @Female Perspective. Nikasema isorite.
Mimi huyo mulaz kwa mfuko nikarudi waks. Following day Sato, nikapata text ya ule ngunaz ati “pris kam tifi anaonesha pishori”. Nikasema sawa nakam majioni, akadai nikam tu saa hiyo ju alikuwa anataka kuwatch. Kuishia nikapata kumbe ni jackpin ya aerial ndio imetoka. Nikarudisha fiti na ku auto search. Tv ikawa poa. Ngunaz alifurahia na kunihag, alinikwamilia nikashindwa form ni gani hapa. Wah kidogo kidogo naskia amepeleka mkono yangu kwa kuma yake. Akanza kunishow ati venye ako horny na sponser ako Naivasha kwa Main wife.
Roho ilidunda nikasema what would @uwesmake do? Kucheki anti-virus onge. Shiet, na sahio mngeus ashangusha leso. Ilibidi nimeingiza mkono kwa mjulubenng na kuisongeza on the left side within my trao and walked out like a BOSS.

:D:D:D

[big_man]

@Nyadist

Congratulations pewa mandathi modo! Na strungi hapo kibanda hilton… Bill is on me.

[system]

Msee huma 6th sense. After sale services zote mtu hu beba Condom…just incase. Hapo pande ya customer care ulifail

[kasaman]

@introvert

You did good.
I walked away from one such situation…ati instant shower haifanyi, kisha ghafla bin vu, the towel dropped.
I’m still wondering whether it was will-power or the daunting task of removing my overall na kunawa mikono.
Either way, nilijitoa nikamuitia electrician.
Lakini nilijikuna kipara for 2 hours straight baada ya hapo na nikikunywa WD40 to thank the gods for the severe eye cleansing.
Mecho ilikuwa pearl white for 45 minutes.
:D:D

That instant shower trick is all over + gas regulators

[kah_tony]

Kuna spice fulani nilikuwa nakamua and I had sworn never to dry fry her juu alikuwa ananikalia kunitrap. A few months before nilikuwa nimempeleka anunue P2 making sure amekunywa nikiona.

Siku moja akanishow tuingie shower, nikasema sawa, foreplay itashika before main screening of the show. Dakika mbili hazijaisha hata kabla kuingia shower alikuwa ashapandilia…no CD in sight, ziko kwa trao kwa bedroom floor na moto ishawaka…ilikuwa imeshika deadly. Next thing I’m pulling out to finish on the toilet cursing the devil and all his kin.

[marine1]

@introvert

You did good.
I walked away from one such situation…ati instant shower haifanyi, kisha ghafla bin vu, the towel dropped.
I’m still wondering whether it was will-power or the daunting task of removing my overall na kunawa mikono.
Either way, nilijitoa nikamuitia electrician.
Lakini nilijikuna kipara for 2 hours straight baada ya hapo na nikikunywa WD40 to thank the gods for the severe eye cleansing.
Mecho ilikuwa pearl white for 45 minutes.
:D:D

Badala ya kugwara bean unadara kipara? Kipara lazima ni muhimu sana

[bushido2]

@syndicate

. Following day Sato, nikapata text ya ule ngunaz ati “pris kam tifi anaonesha pishori”. Nikasema sawa nakam na stew.

nimeachia hapo