Things women do to men? ?

[milvoski]

That Microsoft guy should have jumped out the window…

[Rivermbaji]

@Lucern

[ATTACH=full]119444[/ATTACH]

I’m seated here at my patio looking outside and trying to add things up on how I got here. I just drowned two shots of some Mexicans gin I randomly picked from the fridge to help me think through but still I can’t. This is how it all started:
My friend has been dating a Kenyan lady from California who comes to visit and then goes back. This has been going on for 2 years till last week Monday she asked my friend that morning “Unapanga aje because tunamangana yet we aren’t planning any future. I need to know where we are headed to” This caught him off-guard and as a man he had to buy time to get a clear answer. But to her his answer wasn’t satisfactory enough and she concluded his answer to be “NO PLAN”

Sorry I forgot to mention that my friend works for Microsoft and blows a good salary. His girlfriend works for an audit company but has no makaratasi. Now, where was I? Back to the story, so last week Monday after he dodged the question, she hatched a plot to finish this promising young man and this is how it was executed …
We drank together, me, him and her till 2am when I decided to leave them. I called Uber for a ride home since I was too stoned to drive. I left them at 2.30am. So as usual they went to bed to have sex. When they were done she got up and started screaming loud "You have raped me, you have raped me "and ran to his roommate’s room and cried to him that Pat had raped her. But he calmly told her “Si you guys have sex all the time, how come he has raped you today?” This didn’t calm her instead it added fuel to the fire. She dialed 911 and police came with an ambulance following shortly.

My friend was picked, handcuffed and taken to Burien detention. The witch then wrote a statement with police got a case number and was taken to nearby hospital to pick DNA sample of his semen to incriminate him with sexual assault/rape. I was called Tuesday 6am by his roommate who witnessed it all as I was nursing my hangover. “Pat is in Jail and he is being held on sexual assault/Rape with that Shiko lady you guys were hanging out with yesterday” This hit me like a truck full of sewer and didn’t know where to start.
On Tuesday morning, he was arraigned in court with orange stripped uniform. I almost broke down and cried when I saw him. On Monday, he was a software engineering supervisor but on Tuesday 9am he is a sex offender and a rapist. What was messed up is that this woman/accuser/Shiko went ahead that morning to immigration department located in Tukwila to file papers using the police and doctor’s report to get a UNISA visa (a visa given to immigrants who have no papers if they have a proof that they have been sexually, physically or emotionally abused with an American citizen or permanent resident this visa enables them to work and live like a permanent resident .) We were thinking of raising the $75,000 to bail him out but luckily his sister used her house as a collateral for the bond
Thursday morning, he was freed on bond and at 12pm he received an email that he has been fired from Microsoft with immediate effect. So here I am seated watching that wooden fence, trying to understand what just happened. I have advised for you young men in diaspora especially America

1 Never ever date a Kenyan lady without papers if you know you have no future with her. You might be used as a ladder to her freedom

2 Every time you think of having sex with these women, make sure you have a saved text messages of all the lewd text messages you guys exchange. You never know when this will be handy. Thank God, he had these messages and will help him fight his case next week. If possible record your conversation during sex

3 If you really must, you’d rather sleep with a prostitute than these Kenyan girls, otherwise abstain till you marry

4 Before you get laid make sure you have condoms or anything to protect yourself with. Don’t go inside unprotected

Ill brief you with what the outcome will be next week after court but let’s pray for this young man

Nice redwoods:D:D

[Rivermbaji]

@Patrome

your hamster must have fallen off his wheel a while ago…

:D:D:D:D
Weekend made.

[Rivermbaji]

@milvoski

That Microsoft guy should have jumped out the window…

Into the bios i guess…
You sicko:D:D

[Mzee_mzima]

@coldpilsner

This story doesn’t make sense.

If that was the case si kila mwanamke ana weza tumia rape kama excuse ya kumaliza mtu…

The man has concrete evidence of them being a couple in a stable relationship so hakuna vile a man who is in a long term rship ana amua kurape bibi yake na hawajakua na a bad rship na pia hakuja kua na any case of domestic violence…

Apart from DNA samples, the lady ana faa kukua ame fanyiwa test yakuonyesha ya kuamba kulikua na forceful penetration in her vagina

@coldpilsner

The man was equally drunk, both of them had impaired judgement. Its still needs some force to penetrate a vagina which is not ready for sex…

You are talking too much but you’re saying nothing, sometimes its good to listen and take it in rather than listening to respond.

[shocks]

Is there a guide on identifying psychopath, coz. that is one

[Sterphyle]

Mimi nikifanyiwa hivii nalipa watu wapige mtu copper na nahepa to mexico then get my way to kenya na i live a happy life in kayole

[system]

Poleni! Dang!

[Ice_Cube]

@coldpilsner

The man has concrete evidence of them being a couple in a stable relationship so hakuna vile a man who is in a long term rship ana amua kurape bibi yake na hawajakua na a bad rship na pia hakuja kua na any case of domestic violence…

hehehehe coldpilsner… even your wife can accuse you of marital rape akitaka. Usishangae. Its a minefield. He may not get convicted but all she wants is for him to have a record of being charged with rape/sexual assault. In the U.S. sex crimes are the worst its better even to be charged with attempted murder… that alone is sufficient to ensure you do not go past the initial interview for any work you may seek since in the U.S. your records can be easily accessed using your name only or even ID

[Ice_Cube]

@coldpilsner

The man was equally drunk, both of them had impaired judgement. Its still needs some force to penetrate a vagina which is not ready for sex…

This argument won’t get you off the hook.

Search for the story of the Girl who let her rapist spend the night with her…

In case of a rape allegation, standard practice is to first believe the woman’s word and doubt any word that comes from the man. No prosecutor wants to be accused of “victim shaming.” Its a big thing by the way

[Despotic_megalomania]

All in all, it’s quite sad that I have to tell you since I too am a woman…

But just note, sometimes, you cannot trust a woman but be sure to trust her wants/need in life…
And if it’s citizenship, money, anything else… Provided she gets it, all hell might break loose and to hell with you…
So it is advisable to keep her wants in a secure unreachable place where you can give her in small doses

[Sovereign2]

That’s crazy. I heard of a similar case some years back in Delaware but I don’t know how it ended.
In your friend’s case, TIMING is everything. I’m not an attorney, but he may have a strong defense. The prosecution has to prove, beyond reasonable doubt, that the offense did occur.
His defense strategy would be to show intent of why the lady framed him.

• are you willing to be a witness? The statement he made to you about her concern about their future would make a strong defense for him
• how long has she been in states bila makaratasi? I know this is not an immigration court, but that would be a strong argument to show the lady’s intent of claiming rape
• her filing of papers as soon as the guy was arrested is also a red-flag

He needs to create a solid timeline of their relationship, how may times they had s*x (approximately), and the lady’s recent insecurities about the future of their relationship (his attorney should make it sound like she was desperate to have makaratasi because of the ongoing immigration crackdown).
They really need to push that makaratasi card really hard- she may re-think her strategy and bail out because, when he gets acquitted (I have a feeling that the jury will have a hard time proving his guilt), the lady will get a one way ticket for immigration fraud.

Good luck to him. Please don’t let him down. Get him as many witnesses as you can!

[EngineerLMG]

Ambia rafiki yako pole, ndugu. Wanawake ni wale wale.
Kama Evelyn Lozada alibaki na ring ya 1.4M$ ya Carl Crawford, who is this biash your friend was kamuaring not to ponyoka na visa?

Pole sana kwa masaibu, ndugu.

[weed]

@Despotic_megalomaniac

But just note, sometimes, you cannot trust a woman but be sure to trust her wants/need in life…

THIS IS GOLD!!!

[Ice_Cube]

@Despotic_megalomaniac

All in all, it’s quite sad that I have to tell you since I too am a woman…

But just note, sometimes, you cannot trust a woman but be sure to trust her wants/need in life…
And if it’s citizenship, money, anything else… Provided she gets it, all hell might break loose and to hell with you…
So it is advisable to keep her wants in a secure unreachable place where you can give her in small doses

Bingo! Thank You. The uncomfortable truth

[Lucern]

@Sovereign2

That’s crazy. I heard of a similar case some years back in Delaware but I don’t know how it ended.
In your friend’s case, TIMING is everything. I’m not an attorney, but he may have a strong defense. The prosecution has to prove, beyond reasonable doubt, that the offense did occur.
His defense strategy would be to show intent of why the lady framed him.

• are you willing to be a witness? The statement he made to you about her concern about their future would make a strong defense for him
• how long has she been in states bila makaratasi? I know this is not an immigration court, but that would be a strong argument to show the lady’s intent of claiming rape
• her filing of papers as soon as the guy was arrested is also a red-flag

He needs to create a solid timeline of their relationship, how may times they had s*x (approximately), and the lady’s recent insecurities about the future of their relationship (his attorney should make it sound like she was desperate to have makaratasi because of the ongoing immigration crackdown).
They really need to push that makaratasi card really hard- she may re-think her strategy and bail out because, when he gets acquitted (I have a feeling that the jury will have a hard time proving his guilt), the lady will get a one way ticket for immigration fraud.

Good luck to him. Please don’t let him down. Get him as many witnesses as you can!

-Thanks . Sorry after drinking I passed out -. I told his lawyer I’m going to be his witness . I and his roommate . Thanks for emphasizing that
-We are going to discuss with the lawyer tomorrow and I will raise all these red flags you mentioned about her filing papers immediately after screwing him
-They have been having sex for the last 2 years and that’s why she felt used at one point . It was time I guess for her to get returns for her investments

• she has been in states since 2005. She has a very dirty background of assault and domestic violence, restraining orders name it . We will get more of her details tomorrow after the lawyer does her background check.

But thanks .I have just printed these points you have raised . You made me believe there is hope, though if he wins the case , will they clean his background ? Who wants to be known as rapist and a sex offender ? He has a huge burden behind his back fellows. This is what is draining me . I can handle DUI (Driving under influence ) but sex assault/rape is worse.

[Sovereign2]

@Lucern

• she has been in states since 2005. She has a very dirty background of assault and domestic violence, restraining orders name it . We will get more of her details tomorrow after the lawyer does her background check.

But thanks .I have just printed these points you have raised . You made me believe there is hope, though if he wins the case , will they clean his background ? Who wants to be known as rapist and a sex offender ? He has a huge burden behind his back fellows. This is what is draining me . I can handle DUI (Driving under influence ) but sex assault/rape is worse.

They should use her dirty background (no, I’m not a saint) to prove her moral turpitude. From that angle, they’ll influence the court to question her credibility. Remember: the court has to prove BEYOND reasonable doubt. All you have to do is to just poke holes at her character and her cards will crumble!

At this point your friend should not be worried about his background. He’ll get a record ONLY if he is convicted. Tell him to relax.

[mossimo]

@Lucern

Bro I don’t know what to do. She has work permit now and I’m meant to understand she is going for a job interview for her dream job next week as my brother’s life is ruined . Your fellow Kenyan screwing you this big.im even scared to talk to them.

Pure capitalism. Every man for himself and God for us all. Happened to a guy I know a Kenyan. Was married to a black American woman. She claimed he was sexual abusing their biological sons then about 5 and 3 yrs old. After which she sought social support services; bettered women housing, medicare, social security payments etc. Meanwhile the guy ended up in jail in trouble big time.
We fundraised for him got a good lawyer who squeezed her and till she agreed to change her story. Long story short these women can mess you up big time. Pole to your jamaa.

[Abba]

@Sovereign2

They should use her dirty background (no, I’m not a saint) to prove her moral turpitude. From that angle, they’ll influence the court to question her credibility. Remember: the court has to prove BEYOND reasonable doubt. All you have to do is to just poke holes at her character and her cards will crumble!

At this point your friend should not be worried about his background. He’ll get a record ONLY if he is convicted. Tell him to relax.

You should think of being a lawyer or something of the sort . Your contribution will help them a bunch . Think of changing your career .

[Sovereign2]

@Abba

You should think of being a lawyer or something of the sort . Your contribution will help them a bunch . Think of changing your career .

Haha. No, I only know enough to get myself out of trouble. So far I’ve been able to beat a few charges: one for DUI (driving under the influence) and 2 for speeding. For the dui one the cop made the wrong entry on time as well as the blood alcohol content- I blew just below 0.1 (.08 was limit at that time). The initial entry was correct, but on some of the charging records they somehow indicated more than that.
Two years ago I also beat a Breach of Contract charge (almost $8k)- this was a civil case, not criminal. It’s time consuming though, and plaintiff’s attorneys (2 of them!) were using a lot of jargon in court to intimidate me. I did my homework very well and i knew the right questions to ask (in very simple terms!!). 4 trips to the court and the case was over. I had actually threatened to counter-sue the guys (at that point they were ‘scared’ of me, lol) but I was tired of all the drama.
I learnt a lot about the way the states judicial system works- it’s a mind game. It’s meant to intimidate and frustrate you into accepting plea deals.

As the saying goes: the devil is in the details. What the charge sheet reads vs what supporting evidence was provided. Read line by line and identify and minor “errors”.