This is Guka - Singo Matha Sunday Musings

gashwin · February 17, 2019, 3:17pm

:D:D:D

system · February 17, 2019, 3:18pm

At the 13:13 mark, is that you lifting your hands up?

Teddy_time · February 17, 2019, 3:24pm

Early signs of dementia ishaingia

majizee · February 17, 2019, 3:28pm

A straight talker like @FieldMarshal CouchP is what we need. Men are fed so much bullshiiit

montecarlo · February 17, 2019, 3:29pm

No, this is NOT a hate posting in the likes of those posted by Ms @M2Random .

I just wanted to wonder, loudly, how differently men and women see things. Now I know that, as one brutal Villager once told me, that men of my age are basically attractive to women on one score and one only - the perceived ability to pay up. Old men, the villager told me, bring nothing to the table except the ability to have a little more quid. Otherwise it’s just wrinkled skin, arthritic bones, a beer pot and bad teeth.

Not what a normal 32-year old damsel could call exactly sexy.

And yet. And yet. What makes a 32-year old woman think that I - a mature man admittedly with some deficits - should take an instant liking to her two brats born of two different fathas just because I have expressed the desire to ferk her? Is it that just because I am worn out I should eat up all her shit to compensate? “Guka, si you take me to Nyeri this weekend to collect Chiru? They are breaking for their mid-term. The drive’ll give you a chance to bond”. Or “Guka, see you take me and the gals out these weekend aki? Tume-miss nyama sana”. Or, "Waah, Chiku saw a nice bike at the mall today and she says I ask that you to buy it for her’.

Look, even when my own progeny was young, they knew there was something wrong with me; I could just sit there and watch my own daughter cry for hours on end without feeling a thing. She would cry and cry and cry and wonder, what’s wrong with this one? He isn’t even bothered with me!

Mtoto analia mpaka anachoka. Anaboeka analala. That’s how I used to treat my own babies.

And now you want me, at 68, to start playing loving daddy/Guka to kids who’s fathers I don’t even know just because you occasionally suck my limp d*ck? When will women learn that the normal man, were it not for the law, would kill kids that are not his in a flash? KILL, LITERALLY. Yaani take their head and wring their necks until they break. Or take them far far away to be eaten by hyenas?

Look, ladies. Love your kids all you want. But know this. We don’t want to drive with them or hang out. We don’t want to buy them shit. They are YOURS not OURS. Truth be told, your kids are usually in the way of a good ferk. If I could give them ratrat and get away with it I would. Get this. I don’t want to hear how smart a random brat is or how they are fairing in school. I don’t want to know about their favourite colour or shit.

I am a far simpler man. I just wanna ferk you and move on to the next thing, like drinking a beer.

I don’t think so…
[ATTACH=full]225387[/ATTACH]

mkiawakati96 · February 17, 2019, 3:32pm

Guks kuna single matha hii weekend was like… She had transferred her brats to a good academy which I had sponsored last year( well it pained me…but I reminded her their father should take up responsibility). Sasa nyang’o was like new year ati baby daddy is not paying up fees blah blah!..nikamwambia face value “those ain’t my kids”…akanuliza kama anakuanga ananiuzia(kuma)? Dumped the biatch hapo papo…paid the bill drove off…akaingia blacklist.

FieldMarshal_CouchP · February 17, 2019, 3:35pm

Wacha wewe! Does that look like an old man? Unatuma saa ngapi?

Teddy_time · February 17, 2019, 3:40pm

Its hard enough for a relationship to work without a singo matha bring her kids.

Once her kids are there, they wont even respect you as the father in most cases especially wakifika teenage years. And she will in most cases side with the kid when you wanna displine the kid but if you have kids with her and attempt to discipline, she wont interfere.

Marry a singo matha if you want but know what you are getting in to

system · February 17, 2019, 3:48pm

Tuma number kwa inbox.

FieldMarshal_CouchP · February 17, 2019, 3:52pm

Unatuma ngapi? No need to break my anonymity for 1K.

Halafu utume pia na picha ya magoti nioshe mecho…

M2Random · February 17, 2019, 3:54pm

Mimi ni veined treeholder and everyone knows that.

system · February 17, 2019, 4:02pm

mwombaji hachagui……pia utume picha ya mutii. o_O

FieldMarshal_CouchP · February 17, 2019, 4:03pm

True.

Teddy_time · February 17, 2019, 4:04pm

Sawa my primate brother

FieldMarshal_CouchP · February 17, 2019, 4:04pm

Urahe cigana? Halafu hapo pa magoti usisahau. Picha ya mutii utapata ukitaka…

system · February 17, 2019, 4:09pm

Ukwenda cigana?

Karoga · February 17, 2019, 4:12pm

@Mimi Huwa Namwaga Ndanii ebu come kiasi ,uone a good story ya BOILING THE FROG syndrome and the sad thing Ni singo matha anachemushana:D:D:D

FieldMarshal_CouchP · February 17, 2019, 4:14pm

90%.

inzhener_otmetka · February 17, 2019, 4:14pm

There’s only 5% available for use. The rest has been saved.

system · February 17, 2019, 4:24pm

Pass!

Imagine kama guka ange-save akiwa kijana. Sasa ni kusumbua wajukuu day in, day out. “Ukahe rii?”