This is how the fight started!!!

[krypter]

Wapi ule jamaa wa “figsed” ageuze hekaya uko juu tujue gari ni ya bibi?

[milvoski]

Umekaliwa kama sungura. Type to be cuckolded. Fucking plonker!

[LeoK]

@Githeri

So juzi me and my mama are just lying in bed. I was on my laptop, she was on her phone, a slow beautiful evening. Then the devil decided the evening was too peaceful.
She asked me if I’ve heard about the woman who was shot for having sex in public. Of course, I had read about it and I affirmed that yes I had heard of it. That should have just ended there, but remember the devil had just decided to join us. So me and my stupid mouth said:

Huyo jamaa ndio alimess. He shouldn’t have drove off. Hawa makarao wako njaa, 200 bob na story iko sawa.
Wewe unajuaje angekubali 200 bob?
Ai love, hii ni story kila mtu anajua, hata 100 bob wangechukua. Kuhave sex in a car in public is not a serious offense.
So wewe ushwahi have sex in public?
Ai kwani hujawahi?

Now remember I’m not looking at her. My head is on her thighs and I’m on my laptop. So I turn to face her so I can explain and laugh at her for what she’s missing and we should definitely do it some day. Ile macho nilikutana nayo!!!

Ehe so ukahave sex in public. Niambie next.

At this point I knew I had dug myself in a ditch I won’t be able to get out of, so I decided to shut my beak. And that’s how the argument started. Yesterday I tried talking to her but all she could say was “Hujaniambia vile ulihave sex in public. Ehe then mkararuana (I swear she said raruana) halafu?” Since I’m self employed I wake up very early for work, way before her when she’s spending the night at my house, but she always wakes up to make me breakfast. Same thing as today but then I couldn’t find my car keys so I asked her where it was. She told me she is using the car today I use tuktuk (Nakuru hakuna Uber). So ni mimi na tuktuk till she decides otherwise. I also know hakuna kuraruana till I tell the story. I honestly don’t get women.

I think she’s also in Kenyatalk and since I can’t tell her this in person, here goes. Love, KILA MTU ASHARARUANA IN PUBLIC ACHA UJINGA, GROW UP!!

Weni mjinga sana. There are things that you NEVER tell a woman. NEVER!

[lawi]

@Ken_Sarro

ambia yeye the affair happened before her hence is null and void to her. case closed

Mimi nimewahi sema ivo nikaambiwa ni delete FB picks nimeshikilia kunguru za campo juu the feelings never go away… chiethh

[Slim_fit]

@pseudonym

That is a bit tricky if you’re driving her car. We can be bitchy sometimes…

hapo ndio iko sida. ukipea bibi asiye timamu ball moja atembeange nayo.

[Githeri]

@Capitan

Gari ni ya dame. She cannot imagine the guy ameraruliana kwa gari yake. @Githeri utatuktuk for long.

Gari ni yangu brathe

[Githeri]

@krypter

Wapi ule jamaa wa “figsed” ageuze hekaya uko juu tujue gari ni ya bibi?

Yangu

[Githeri]

Ho

@LeoK

Weni mjinga sana. There are things that you NEVER tell a woman. NEVER!

Honestly thought it was going to an epic story then we laugh it off…

[AMB_Sunday]

Just text her name umwambie aweke mpira mpangoni

[Master_N]

Hebu leo rudi kwa hao ukiwa na furaha mob akiuliza mshow uliraruania kwa tuktuk leo…

[tall_mnyama_everywhe]

cant relate

[conoiseur]

Wow. Kweli watu wakona shida pale nje. But be strong bro! and probably next time choose your words more carefully depending on the context of the conversation you are having with your mama. Lakini sasa ata uyo dame na yeye, took it way too personal for obvious reasons

[Oxygen]

@Mundu Mulosi

So amechukua gari hata yeye aende araruane ama.?

Atafute kaboy kamurarurie kwa gari park pia

[inzhener_otmetka]

@Slim_fit

usibembelezane. The rule is always: “what you feel you should do about a woman, do the opposite”.

So if you feel like working on the ikus, you should disregard it and work on mkia?

[inzhener_otmetka]

Have you tried a handshake?

[WuTang]

Kaa ngumu kiyana.

[Amore]

@Ken_Sarro

ambia yeye the affair happened before her hence is null and void to her. case closed

My friend there’s never a closed case…ata akajua ulikuwa na dem primary bado utakuwa na kesi ya kujibu

[Ricovet]

Kama gari ni yako but bibi anakataa na funguo unaabiri tuktuk shida imeanzia hapo

[Baby_Panay]

I have said something I wasn’t supposed to say. Akichukua bag akajitoa.

[tomo_bwaku]

Tutasema mara ngapi ‘Mwanaume ni kuruka’…