WANAUME

Sex & Relationships
21

And this is something you’re prepared to actually believe at over 30 years of age?

22

This is a fact …not just some belief

23

@Mimi Huwa Namwaga Ndanii , @Alpha Male pass by please

24

Lazima mzee asaidiwe, either na dildo au ben ten

25

This is straight out of a post by a single dumped woman on Kilimani mums or the myriads of other bitter feminists on Twitter.
No sane man can write such bull crap.

26

My paternal grandpa married at 55 na ilikua ile ya kulazimishiwa. Got 9 kids and lived to be 116yrs old. Aliona his great great grandchildren - a term we couldn’t find in Kale language during his eulogy. So sioni shida hapo

27

That lil man next to grace got his pimp on… I foresee a very bright future for him

28

So you think you will talk a 20-25 year old woman to sleep every day. You are lost. And are slowly getting there. Don’t worry though. Your shamba boy will help you. Ama watchie. A- of 94.

29

100% guaranteed some of those kids he didn’t seer. Pre-DNA mamenos.

30

You have a very small mind to think married couples have meaningful sex

31

And that led to the mongoloid you

32

50 times Sweeter than sex with a kunguru.

33

Here’s the thing fellows, I was engaged to be married at 27, actually i was on the very verge of the aisle to say " I do", everything was set and laid out… but then i asked myself one thing, what if i live to be 77? Which is very likely

At 27, those are 5 full and virgin decades

So u want to tell me in 50 years - unless i will be super drunk and horny throughout those years - do u want to convince me that,

  1. I will always find my then wife-to-be super attractive and sensual like a 21 year old PYT?

  2. I will never get tired/bored of her nagging tendencies, failing fertility, diminishing health and waning sexual arousal, esp after menopause?

  3. She will never be unfaithful whatsover and sire kids outside the union?

  4. She will always be the submissive, meek and eager-to-please damsel that i married?

  5. Her extended family won’t sabotage our union for whatever reason?

Nilikaa chini for 6 straight hours na nikapiga hizi mahesabu zote, i even employed matrix and partial differential equations na manze hazikuingiana…

I called off the wedding and booked a flight to zanzibar instead, nika kaa chini on an open beach with my single malt scotch and said, “ferk it man” …i am facing this life alone…

Wenye wanaoana, acha waoane. I wish them the very best in life:D:D:D

34

Done

35

Already done so

36

Yaani hata mbegu huna na unakaribia 40?

37

Even at 60 mbegu nitakuwa nazo Omwamiii

38

I don’t really see having kids as an achievement. Mimi I’ve forced 2 women to abort, one of them twice. Mtoto utalea akiwa mkubwa ataenda kwake wewe ubaki na uzee na upweke tuu. So sioni vile hao watakusaidia in old age

39

what happened to the lady omwami…did she get married…I am dying to know

40

murderer