:D:D:D:D
Looking for advice from here is the worst thing one can ever do.
one thing I know is that women know how to sell themselves very well. If you wait for late thirties the chances of landing a young high above average woman are nil. watu huwa hawaachilii wakipata. And those kind of women are rare. I dont know, but the women i see my fellow friends putting up with do not surbodinate at all. Me i deal with beautiful, less independent people. I find them more convenient though not for marriage.
Let me offer you an itemised analysis of the qualities that you’re looking for:
a) ‘God fearing’: God fearing, in the Kenyan context, implies a woman who perceives her pastor as her god. That is, a woman who will always be dashing to the pastor to seek solutions to her tiny marital problems. I need not tell you the end result when the pastor starts offering her a ‘shoulder to cry on’. So, you have been warned: don’t complain when she sleeps with her pastor because ‘you were never there for her’. Be wary seven times of a woman obsessed with pastors.
b) a good cook: It depends on her upbringing. Many ‘modern’ women are simply horrible cooks. They hate the kitchen. You don’t expect a ‘modern’ woman to mess up her nails trying to cook for you, do you?
c) with brains, beautiful: Hapa, you’re in for a shock that will strike you back to reality. If she has brains and is beautiful, she most likely is not interested in marriage as she has tens of sponsors to take care of her. Investigate the lifestyles of the so called ‘hot’ news anchors. You wouldn’t want any of them to be your long term partner. Exceptionally beautiful women are full of themselves.
d) good hearted: In your dreams, you expect a beautiful, brainy woman to be good hearted? I tell you almost all of them are narcissists in love with even their pee. You expect to cheat on a hot woman and she hangs around you, ready to forgive you?
e) ‘Loving’: for as long as your bank account is fat with many inlets, you’ll get lots and lots of ‘love’. And seriously, in your illusions, you expect a hot, brainy career oriented Nairobi woman(who is probably indoctrinated with feminazism BS) to treat you like a king???
f) she must also be a lioness in bedroom matters: In short, you want an experienced hoe with unbelievable mileage. They are very many in Nairobi. This is your only realistic expectation. But even then, some with big mileages are pathetic in bed.
g) I want a woman who is wholly good: Look for a realistic woman not a perfect woman. If you meet a ‘wholly good’ woman, come for one of my kidneys.
In short, you are chasing wind as you’ve put it.
some education, good heart, honesty, nice bum and tits should be the only requirements…if at all you are a real man but if you are trying to find someone to compliment your deficiencies then go on with your search.
Genuine advice, the women will complement each other and he’ll never complain. Only catch is that you have to be wise (Solomonic or Akuku Danger-ish wisdom) and strong so as to meet their needs…oh, and be able to provide equally for both of them and children when they come.
…
:D:D
Married last year when I was 37 yrs, reason, I was waiting for the perfect lady.
Lesson I learned, we only compliment each other, and don’t think u are perfect, .
Comprehending this is like giving out your bare throat to a speared man. I still believe in getting ‘the one’.
I have been in the same boat with you.I think I am more perfectionist than you are only that chances in life have differed.The pressure is there too but my folks tend to act cool even though I can read disappointment in their faces.Being a firstborn I learnt how to do most of the stuff by myself.
I am your age mate,and i have started to compromise because I have come to learn you cannot have it all.The person you are looking for is only in your mind.Once I came across one beautiful lady,she had all I was looking for,got together but boy her mouth always gave this awful smell,something I wasn’t ready to put up with.So what am I trying to say.You will get a person with most of the characteristics that you are looking for but may be find them lacking one which could be vital.If you find such take her and let her know of her weakness.Teach her,coach her.You will also realize that in as much you are a perfectionist,some of your weakness will be exposed.
EXACTLY!
Flaws dont go well with me. I doubt if I can learn to compliment.
Basi enda ujoin ule jamaa wa CBK mulalange kwa dormitory. Uko ni place ya ma-perfectionist.
spot on…same as men…
From another perspective, it seems you are trying to look for someone who will give you ‘happiness’ and satisfaction. If you cannot make yourself happy, no one else can, and least of all, never expect a woman to make you happy. She will make you ‘happy’ only because you offer stability and future success to your offspring. Wives first priority is their kids, not you. Her desire to make her marriage work is based around the future of the kids. That is why many married women say that were it not for the kids, they’d simply walk out of their marriages. Do not buy the crap that there is a ‘special’ someone for you. There isn’t. If you live in Lebanon, you will get your ‘special’ someone there. If you’re a millionaire, there are literally hundreds of women who will feel they need to be your ‘special someone’. If your millions disappear, you will only be left with that special someone called ‘Palmela Njerry’.
Stop viewing marriage based on lovey-dovey expectations. To many women, it is simply a strategic move meant to secure their future and the kid’s future. Otherwise, before committing, ensure that you are also gaining something tangible from her; after all, many modern marriages are simply alliances of opportunism and hypocrisy.
I get you man, I am trying very hard… read very hard to imagine myself settling with one who is not up to tasks. But ya Mungu ni mengi, I will live and may be, I repeat, may be, I can compromise beauty and settle for an average one and her having good job.
Hehehe standards ni muhimu, I lower them for no one, either way stopped looking for this thing called love ikinipata sawa.
Just tell this guy the truth. He should get his head out of the clouds, he sounds naive.
I am a Catholic btw, and that was just another thought!
From your post, you sound like a narcissist. That won’t take you anywhere in the dating game because you are full of vanity.