Be careful guys

[Nattydread]

Ujinga gani huu?

[Duke_of_Coomersvile]

Man, you’re either gay or just plain dumb. How do you even shift tables to join some guys like a little bitch. That was gay as fuck and probably what painted you as fair game to those fags. Alafu kuharibu unafuata mwanaume hadi kwake. Whenever you leave the club with a chic and go to your house unakuwanga umeenda kurarua vitu. Why the fuck did you expect a different outcome when you followed a nigga to his house? Wacha tu tuseme the whole of that night you acted like a bitch.

[conoiseur]

Msee you deserved everything you faced in that ordeal. Sasa ungefunguliwa server ungeambia nini watu?

[kiLo]

Uliingia mtego wa dume na akapiga gate kifuli kubwa? Hawezi jitoa, mzeiya. Alikuwekelea mkono kwa shoulder na kupuliza kerosene lamp. Pole kwa masaibu, mblo

[Slim_fit]

Mboss kama ulisomwa ngaseti sema. And why the hell would you accompany a man you just met to his kichinjio?

[Pendejo]

An idiot and his butt cheeks are soon parted, case in point.

[kush_yule_mnono]

@Private developer

summary ni jamaa alichunishwa skuma

… and @Panyaste loves this

[MajorProphet]

@mzitomimi

This happened on a beautiful wednesday evening in small town called Makindu along Nairobi-Mombasa highway after kumalizia previsit ya shamba i wanted to subdivide. Nlijipata in a ‘popular’ club called Zuscar sipping my cold guiness. The club had very few people but juu ilikuwa weekday in a rural dusty town nlielewa. I noticed a group of 5 students 3 ladies and 2 boys na a petite dark lady akirombosa kurombosa peke yake kwa dance floor. The music was also extremely loud with the waiters very idle yaani kulikuwa kunaboesha mbaya sana though i was in the company of my one and only true friend Bwana guiness. Bahati nzuri nkiwa natoka kwa washrooms nlipatana na one of the male students who happened to be the resident dj nkamuuliza kuhusu venye naeza pata company akaniambia usijali atakuja penye umeketi bora ucheze kivyako. At the same time some guy overheard our short conversation akaingilia kati akaniambia bro hata usimind kam utujoin. Mimi nkajifeel nyumbani nkamjoin at their table alikuwa na beshte yake wakiteremsha KC polepole. Tulijuana haraka haraka akaniambia yeye ni primary school teacher akanionyesha hadi some whatsapp groups they shared as primary school teachers in that area politics kidogo tukilament venye uhuruto wanatunyonya. One of the female students came to join us but beshte ya uyo jamaa was the first to engage her in a conversation. Ulevi ulipanda na askofu naye akadai kufika promised land. The guy alichukua namba na lady left but mode akaniambia niko na mabeshte wangu clean naeza kuorganize akaniambia mi naishi hapa nyuma tu. Tulitoka na yeye but tulisumbuliwa na ladies wenye walikuwa nyuma ya the trailers with some heavy kamba accents ati " mboss mtasoma ngazeti." Mode akaniambia achana nao ata madem wawili wanakam sa hii in the next 10mins . Tulienda kwa nyumba yake a one bedroomed house in a kaplot with about 8 residential units. Story ziliendelea akinichocha about how pretty the ladies were. After abiut 15 mins nikamuuliza kwani hawakam bana he then made a 10sec phone call akaniambia ati ata wameconfirm wako on their way. Then kidogo kidogo akatoa katoothpick kake akicomplain about how he feels less of a man because of the tiny thing. I felt uncomfortable steam ya pombe ikashuka nkaanza kuwa alert juu i felt something was not right. I played it cool nkamuuliza hao madem vipi akamake another short phone call akaniambia ni mmoja ata atakam eti tutampiga combi mi nimalize alafu yeye akeshe naye. After almost half an hour i told him tutoke tuangalie if there is hope on the other side. Jamaa akainsist tubaki because the lady alikuwa karibu kufika but nikasimama and headed for the door. The guy akaanza kusmile akaeka mikono yake kwa mabega yangu akanimbia leo lazima nitakunyonya mboo. I never responded nlitulia nkamwambia twende nje juu nlijua there was lurking danger na hiyo gate ilikuwa imefungwa na kufuli ingine kubwa kweli. Nkamwambia ni sawa twende kwanza nje akafungua gate akanionyesha a long dark alley akaniambia hapa ni ubaya several peopl wameuwawa na enyewe it was dark and felt insecure kabisa. But the thought ya kuchanganya mixer ilinipea morale nkatoka hapo roho juu nkikimbia nikishout ka mbaya mbaya. Nkarudi club Zuscar nkauliza kawaiter kalikuwa kakituserve akaniambia those were a g** couple na nlikuwa nipigwe combi. Guys be xtra careful si mchele peke yake.

Such a romantic tale

[Jaweed]

@mzitomimi

This happened on a beautiful wednesday evening in small town called Makindu along Nairobi-Mombasa highway after kumalizia previsit ya shamba i wanted to subdivide. Nlijipata in a ‘popular’ club called Zuscar sipping my cold guiness. The club had very few people but juu ilikuwa weekday in a rural dusty town nlielewa. I noticed a group of 5 students 3 ladies and 2 boys na a petite dark lady akirombosa kurombosa peke yake kwa dance floor. The music was also extremely loud with the waiters very idle yaani kulikuwa kunaboesha mbaya sana though i was in the company of my one and only true friend Bwana guiness. Bahati nzuri nkiwa natoka kwa washrooms nlipatana na one of the male students who happened to be the resident dj nkamuuliza kuhusu venye naeza pata company akaniambia usijali atakuja penye umeketi bora ucheze kivyako. At the same time some guy overheard our short conversation akaingilia kati akaniambia bro hata usimind kam utujoin. Mimi nkajifeel nyumbani nkamjoin at their table alikuwa na beshte yake wakiteremsha KC polepole. Tulijuana haraka haraka akaniambia yeye ni primary school teacher akanionyesha hadi some whatsapp groups they shared as primary school teachers in that area politics kidogo tukilament venye uhuruto wanatunyonya. One of the female students came to join us but beshte ya uyo jamaa was the first to engage her in a conversation. Ulevi ulipanda na askofu naye akadai kufika promised land. The guy alichukua namba na lady left but mode akaniambia niko na mabeshte wangu clean naeza kuorganize akaniambia mi naishi hapa nyuma tu. Tulitoka na yeye but tulisumbuliwa na ladies wenye walikuwa nyuma ya the trailers with some heavy kamba accents ati " mboss mtasoma ngazeti." Mode akaniambia achana nao ata madem wawili wanakam sa hii in the next 10mins . Tulienda kwa nyumba yake a one bedroomed house in a kaplot with about 8 residential units. Story ziliendelea akinichocha about how pretty the ladies were. After abiut 15 mins nikamuuliza kwani hawakam bana he then made a 10sec phone call akaniambia ati ata wameconfirm wako on their way. Then kidogo kidogo akatoa katoothpick kake akicomplain about how he feels less of a man because of the tiny thing. I felt uncomfortable steam ya pombe ikashuka nkaanza kuwa alert juu i felt something was not right. I played it cool nkamuuliza hao madem vipi akamake another short phone call akaniambia ni mmoja ata atakam eti tutampiga combi mi nimalize alafu yeye akeshe naye. After almost half an hour i told him tutoke tuangalie if there is hope on the other side. Jamaa akainsist tubaki because the lady alikuwa karibu kufika but nikasimama and headed for the door. The guy akaanza kusmile akaeka mikono yake kwa mabega yangu akanimbia leo lazima nitakunyonya mboo. I never responded nlitulia nkamwambia twende nje juu nlijua there was lurking danger na hiyo gate ilikuwa imefungwa na kufuli ingine kubwa kweli. Nkamwambia ni sawa twende kwanza nje akafungua gate akanionyesha a long dark alley akaniambia hapa ni ubaya several peopl wameuwawa na enyewe it was dark and felt insecure kabisa. But the thought ya kuchanganya mixer ilinipea morale nkatoka hapo roho juu nkikimbia nikishout ka mbaya mbaya. Nkarudi club Zuscar nkauliza kawaiter kalikuwa kakituserve akaniambia those were a g** couple na nlikuwa nipigwe combi. Guys be xtra careful si mchele peke yake.

Boss sema to ukweli ulifunguliwa boot. Anyway how was it?

[negrowegrow]

Pia wewe unadaisha mkia, yaani after hii fagget kuturn bottom bado unamkwamia akupe raha. Wah

[Lonely_Lover]

Kuna ujinga na kuna ujinga.
Nimewachia hapo kwa mkono kwa mabega.

[SledgeHammer]

thread ya 2019 mnaifufua ya nini sasa?